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so kakabalik ko lang galing thailand nung sat. nandun ako for practically a week, arrived nung feb 1 sa bangkok stayed there for a day and a half, tapos pumunta ng hua hin tapos sumalangit sa sheraton hotels and resorts ng apat na araw, ngunit kinailangan bumaba uli sa katotohanan ng mundo at bumalik sa bangkok nung feb 5. tapos feb 6, sabado ayun uwian na sa pilipinas.
ok naman. third time ko nang makapuntang bangkok, at 2nd time na ako lang magisa umiikot. komportable na ako at medyo naaalala ko pa ung skytrain (MRT thing nila) at ung mga ruta papunta sa the usual shopping places. nung day 1 ayun nagshopping at nagikot lang ako. nagtagal ako dun sa super laking bookstore ng Kinokuniya sa Siam Paragon (parang ibang level na Shang ng Bangkok) kasi super *drool* ako dun sa mga illustration books nila dun. as in. pamatay. anyway, bumili lang ako ng isang shirt, at isang shorts tapos the rest na ng budget ko naka-allot na sa mga pasalubong. gosh no? leche kayong mga mabibigyan ng pasalubon ah, sana lang maappreciate niyo ang pagpapahalagang binibigay ko sa kaligayahan niyo. haha.
anyway ung 4 days sa hua hin, ok lang naman. super sosy ng resort. as in. mga 200$ per night... kthx. buti na lang sagot na un nung kompanya nila ma. sabit lang kasi ako sa kanila ni kuya at ma, on business sila ako ay nakikijoin lamang na turista. anyway, ayun ikot onti sa local sites, night market at walang kamatayang tambay sa beach front, swimming, at tulog/ nood ng TV sa kwarto.
tapos nung pagbalik sa bangkok, nagpunta kami ni ate fritzie (ang kanang kamay ni mama sa office) sa... *sumting* night bazaar, along wireless rd. nakalimutan ko name eh sorry. pero super laki niya. siguro kakailanganin mo nang 3 gabi para malibot ng mainam yung lugar. pero ayun, astig siya. daming bags. may obssession ako with ethnic themed bags eh. haha, parang karamihan ata ng pasalubong na nabili ko bag. anyway ayun. pinaka nagenjoy ako sa shopping haha, kahit na parang halos lahat ng binili ko para sa ibang tao.
ay bago ko makalimutan. zomg street food. pamatay sa sarap at anghang. as in. kailangan lang talaga ishare at ipaalam sa mundo, na pag kakain ka sa bangkok, hongkong, vietnam, or most of mga south east asian countries ang tunay na local cuisine ay matitikman mo sa side stalls, at simpleng mga kainan sa tabi-tabi.
so ngayong nakauwi na ako back to work na. ako na kasi nagmamanage na talaga (under mommy's undying guidance) ng shop. at since nasa singapore pa si ma, at si kuya ay gone for good for all intents and purposes, medyo solo mode ako ngayong linggo sa pagpapatakbo ng shop. stress. tapos kanina, nagkaincident na malupet. stress talaga. ok naman, i guess pero alam mo un. medyo baguhan ka pa... ay correction baguhan ka pa talaga, tapos iniwan ka magisa ng boss mo, para kausapin ung mga iba pang boss ng lugar. ahay, gud lak na lang di ba. tapos may big decisions pang kailangang gawin, although nakakausap ko si ma afterwards tungkol sa mga final decisions. pero still, alam mo un. nakaka-kaba. at ang hirap harapin on equal footing with confidence ung iba pang tenants at ung landlady. anyway. ok naman i guess. learning experience.
so yan na lang muna. kk babershk.
ok naman. third time ko nang makapuntang bangkok, at 2nd time na ako lang magisa umiikot. komportable na ako at medyo naaalala ko pa ung skytrain (MRT thing nila) at ung mga ruta papunta sa the usual shopping places. nung day 1 ayun nagshopping at nagikot lang ako. nagtagal ako dun sa super laking bookstore ng Kinokuniya sa Siam Paragon (parang ibang level na Shang ng Bangkok) kasi super *drool* ako dun sa mga illustration books nila dun. as in. pamatay. anyway, bumili lang ako ng isang shirt, at isang shorts tapos the rest na ng budget ko naka-allot na sa mga pasalubong. gosh no? leche kayong mga mabibigyan ng pasalubon ah, sana lang maappreciate niyo ang pagpapahalagang binibigay ko sa kaligayahan niyo. haha.
anyway ung 4 days sa hua hin, ok lang naman. super sosy ng resort. as in. mga 200$ per night... kthx. buti na lang sagot na un nung kompanya nila ma. sabit lang kasi ako sa kanila ni kuya at ma, on business sila ako ay nakikijoin lamang na turista. anyway, ayun ikot onti sa local sites, night market at walang kamatayang tambay sa beach front, swimming, at tulog/ nood ng TV sa kwarto.
tapos nung pagbalik sa bangkok, nagpunta kami ni ate fritzie (ang kanang kamay ni mama sa office) sa... *sumting* night bazaar, along wireless rd. nakalimutan ko name eh sorry. pero super laki niya. siguro kakailanganin mo nang 3 gabi para malibot ng mainam yung lugar. pero ayun, astig siya. daming bags. may obssession ako with ethnic themed bags eh. haha, parang karamihan ata ng pasalubong na nabili ko bag. anyway ayun. pinaka nagenjoy ako sa shopping haha, kahit na parang halos lahat ng binili ko para sa ibang tao.
ay bago ko makalimutan. zomg street food. pamatay sa sarap at anghang. as in. kailangan lang talaga ishare at ipaalam sa mundo, na pag kakain ka sa bangkok, hongkong, vietnam, or most of mga south east asian countries ang tunay na local cuisine ay matitikman mo sa side stalls, at simpleng mga kainan sa tabi-tabi.
so ngayong nakauwi na ako back to work na. ako na kasi nagmamanage na talaga (under mommy's undying guidance) ng shop. at since nasa singapore pa si ma, at si kuya ay gone for good for all intents and purposes, medyo solo mode ako ngayong linggo sa pagpapatakbo ng shop. stress. tapos kanina, nagkaincident na malupet. stress talaga. ok naman, i guess pero alam mo un. medyo baguhan ka pa... ay correction baguhan ka pa talaga, tapos iniwan ka magisa ng boss mo, para kausapin ung mga iba pang boss ng lugar. ahay, gud lak na lang di ba. tapos may big decisions pang kailangang gawin, although nakakausap ko si ma afterwards tungkol sa mga final decisions. pero still, alam mo un. nakaka-kaba. at ang hirap harapin on equal footing with confidence ung iba pang tenants at ung landlady. anyway. ok naman i guess. learning experience.
so yan na lang muna. kk babershk.
naisip ko to nung friday eh, nung pauwi after ng baby shower ni meme. di naman sa emo pero pumasok lang sa isip ko nung sumabay sakin pauwi apat kong kaibigan. naguusap kasi sila tapos tahimik lang ako at medyo nakafocus sa pagdridrive -- saka wala lang, ewan ko... tahimik lang talaga ako. tapos naisip ko ano ba role ko sa circle namin. i mean of course hindi mo naman kayang i contain completely sa "roles" ang naibibigay mo sa isang circle of friends, pero kahit papaano may certain generic roles ang bawat isa. ung tipong mga class clown, mga ganon ba (although un lang naisip kong generic role hahaha). pero sige fine, wag na lang natin i-kahon sa generic na role. ilagay na lang natin sa isang diretsong tanong -- "ano silbe mo sa grupo niyo?". actually mahirap parin sagutin eh... ano na lang "may kulang ba sa grupo niyo pag wala ka?". yan. yan siguro ang isang paraan para sabihin un.
hahaha, medyo emo actually. pero hindi ko siya naisip in the context of being emo, just out of curiousity. kasi parang ang saya ng usapan nila pero wala naman ako talagang kino-contribute. well nakijoin naman ako here and there (nung medyo outrageous na ung usapan nila haha) pero alam mo un parang hindi ko naman nafeel na out of place ako sa grupo nung time na un na parang nagpapaka-loner ako sa pagdri-drive, or kahit sa ibang instances na tahimik ako. ganon lang kasi talaga ako. pero un nga, kung di naman dun ang aking nacocontribute sa pagkakaibigan namin... saan?
at since di ko maisip, ibang bagay na lang. napansin ko na mahilig ako gumawa ng something extra para sa mga kaibigan ko. siguro part of reinforcing ung chivalrous-gentleman thing na attitude ko. pero eitherway, parang dun ako natutuwa. paghatid sa kaibigan kahit na di naman kailangan. or manlibre minsan, kahit na sinusunog mo pitaka mo. or siguro ung pagiging sabik ko sa paglabas pag may nagaaya kahit na medyo hassle, or ung pagaayos ko ng mga labas kahit madalas fail kasi ang hirap nila hatakin.
so naisip ko siguro un ang role ko. drayber. di joke lang hahahaha. pero un nga, naisip ko parang silent na pillar/sandalan (kapal eh no). ewan ko. parang secretary bodyguard tuloy dating ko. tahimik lang habang nagchichikahan sila. tagabukas ng pinto. taga hatid kasi may kotse. tumutulong sa pagaayos ng small na labas pag kailangan ng tulong. may comment pag hiningan, or may onting hirit pag may kaganapan. parang ang unglamorous ng role, pero i guess komportable naman ako sa lugar ko.
pede pa sigurong ituloy to... pero haha diyan na kasi natapos ang pagninilaynilay ko sa mga bagay bagay. at dahil diyan. babershk.
hahaha, medyo emo actually. pero hindi ko siya naisip in the context of being emo, just out of curiousity. kasi parang ang saya ng usapan nila pero wala naman ako talagang kino-contribute. well nakijoin naman ako here and there (nung medyo outrageous na ung usapan nila haha) pero alam mo un parang hindi ko naman nafeel na out of place ako sa grupo nung time na un na parang nagpapaka-loner ako sa pagdri-drive, or kahit sa ibang instances na tahimik ako. ganon lang kasi talaga ako. pero un nga, kung di naman dun ang aking nacocontribute sa pagkakaibigan namin... saan?
at since di ko maisip, ibang bagay na lang. napansin ko na mahilig ako gumawa ng something extra para sa mga kaibigan ko. siguro part of reinforcing ung chivalrous-gentleman thing na attitude ko. pero eitherway, parang dun ako natutuwa. paghatid sa kaibigan kahit na di naman kailangan. or manlibre minsan, kahit na sinusunog mo pitaka mo. or siguro ung pagiging sabik ko sa paglabas pag may nagaaya kahit na medyo hassle, or ung pagaayos ko ng mga labas kahit madalas fail kasi ang hirap nila hatakin.
so naisip ko siguro un ang role ko. drayber. di joke lang hahahaha. pero un nga, naisip ko parang silent na pillar/sandalan (kapal eh no). ewan ko. parang secretary bodyguard tuloy dating ko. tahimik lang habang nagchichikahan sila. tagabukas ng pinto. taga hatid kasi may kotse. tumutulong sa pagaayos ng small na labas pag kailangan ng tulong. may comment pag hiningan, or may onting hirit pag may kaganapan. parang ang unglamorous ng role, pero i guess komportable naman ako sa lugar ko.
pede pa sigurong ituloy to... pero haha diyan na kasi natapos ang pagninilaynilay ko sa mga bagay bagay. at dahil diyan. babershk.
inimbita kasi ako ni nina kung gusto ko raw sumama sa pagbisita kina-DR bukas (thursday). ako naman go lang, kasi kailangan ko rin bigay kay cesca (anak ni DR) ung gift niya sa pasko (kasi ninong). so ako naman todo effort sa gift, well hindi ung gift mismo pero ung pagbabalot ng gift hahaha, ay pero pinili ko rin naman ung gift ng maayos. anyway medyo sablay nga ung pagbalot ko. ung take 1 ay fail kasi nakalimutan ko na pano magbalot ng gift, ang napupunta sa isip ko ung pano balutan ng plastic mga libro (school kasi hahaha). eh haller obvious naman na iba un, so ayun nga fail attempt take 1. take 2 nagbukas pa ako sa internet ng website ng "howto". pero in fairness naman sakin naalala ko pano magbalot mga a third through the process. ang problema lang, popup book siya so medyo mahangin sa loob so hindi mo magawang completely compact ung balot mo. nakakadissapoint tuloy ung less than perfect balot na nagawa ko (sorry artist's pride). anyway sinubukan ko na lang bawiin sa ribbon. pati to inaral ko pa sa internet hahaha. hay effort para sa bata. at pagnakita niya to, mga 5 seconds limas na ang effort mo sa pagbabalot, kthx. hahahaha.
tapos nung kausap ko si nina apparently gimik ni mei, chanda, at josine ung pagpunta kina DR at saling pusa lang raw si nina. therefore nung inimbita niya ako, sabit lang ako ng saling pusa XD. parang nakakahiya. may OP potential pa dahil... well puro babae sila XD. anyway. oh well. keri lang, dapat na rin akong pumunta kasi di ako nakasama sa cebu at aalis na si mei papuntang japan ng sunday. at least makakatambay ako kasama siya bago ang alis niya.
anyfoo yan na lang muna. may mga nangyari pa kaninag umaga tulad ng stress na DSL application na utos ni ma. tapos on a non-stress-but-more-of-exciting note ako malamang papalit kay kuya sa pagmanage ng shop habang wala pa akong formal employment, pupunta na kasi si kuya sa bangkok sa jan 18. keri to, sana marami akong matutunan.
ge. babershk~
tapos nung kausap ko si nina apparently gimik ni mei, chanda, at josine ung pagpunta kina DR at saling pusa lang raw si nina. therefore nung inimbita niya ako, sabit lang ako ng saling pusa XD. parang nakakahiya. may OP potential pa dahil... well puro babae sila XD. anyway. oh well. keri lang, dapat na rin akong pumunta kasi di ako nakasama sa cebu at aalis na si mei papuntang japan ng sunday. at least makakatambay ako kasama siya bago ang alis niya.
anyfoo yan na lang muna. may mga nangyari pa kaninag umaga tulad ng stress na DSL application na utos ni ma. tapos on a non-stress-but-more-of-exciting note ako malamang papalit kay kuya sa pagmanage ng shop habang wala pa akong formal employment, pupunta na kasi si kuya sa bangkok sa jan 18. keri to, sana marami akong matutunan.
ge. babershk~
this will be one of those longer entries, considering long entries are the norm for most of my posts. the things i'll be sharing seem to be connected, but ah well one can never honestly tell the how cohesive thoughts are when you're trying to force yourself to sleep. but even if they are linked by just the basic idea that the title suggests, i think it was worth the 40mins or so of twisting, turning, flipping and all the acrobatics one does in the effort to find sleep.
sige na nga puta, sirain na natin ang pormalan. baka maglaho lang ang mga naisip ko. so gawin na lang nating ang feel niya ay parang chikahan lang at tambay kasama close friend/s at may hawak na kape or bote ng beer kung ano man mas feel mo. game.
so kausap kita, sabihin natin, at sha-share ko kung ano nasa isip ko. alam mo matagal ko nang iniisip, kung bakit parang ang restrained ng mga tao. ako kasi marami akong iniisip, minsan problema or minsan random stuff na nakukuha interest ko. pero usually, pag may significant akong concern gusto ko siya pagusapan. pero parang ang hirap ishare kasi ung mga taong ka-close mo, or mga taong kasama mo parang ang, having no other word for it, "mature". parang may oras na darating na biglang kailangan niyong maging strong. for example, si tin, alam ko stressed siya at nahihirapan pero di ko siya naririnig umimiik nang matindi na "puta ang hirap ng buhay ko". hindi ko alam kung, pag in-acknowledge mo ba ung fact na nahihirapan kayo ay mahihirapan talaga kayo or talagang gusto lang nilang i contain at ihandle sa sarili nila ung problem. at ako kahit na gusto ko pagusapan mga nangyayari sakin, na ishare siya sa isang taong komportable akong makipagchikahan tungkol sa kahit ano, parang napipigilan ako. parang nakakahiya na "ako lang ba ang immature dito?". na "ako lang ba ang hindi kayang handle ang nangyayari sa buhay ko?". alam ko kailangan ko ring tumanda in a sense, pero ewan. dapat nga ba maging matigas tayo? natural bang process to nang growth sa kultura ang society natin? di ko alam.
ung isa ko pang naisip, ay kung gaano ako kablessed. may isang lecture/homily kasi akong napuntahan last sunday. tapos ung isang idea na pinaliwanag nung pastor ay grace (love, grace, at hope). ngayon ako, honestly hindi ako zealous christian. sa totoo lang tingin ko wala akong kwentang christyano minsan (moral pero hindi gaano religious, or baka tingin ko lang). pero anyway maganda ung sinabi nung pastor on the idea of grace. sabi niya grace is god at work. at ang absence of grace ay man at work. anyway mag focus tayo sa grace = god at work. marami siyang sinabi eh, pero basically grace is something hard to comprehend. for example kung tayo raw, ung mga pumatay sa maguindanao massacre ay ikukulong natin. given the choice baka ipapatay pa natin sa death row. pero grace raw ay papatawarin natin sila, papakawalan, at siguro ipapavisit sa isang priest or pastor na makaka-inspire sa kanila to change. parang ang gago eh no. parang joke time. ikaw, tingin mo ba HONESTLY magbabago pa mga yan? asa. pero sabi niya, if you cannot understand grace then you have not received it yet. god at work, not man at work. so from there naisip ko lang ung isa kong kaibigan. na putang ina talaga ilang beses ko nang naka-away, inaway, insulted to a degree, even doubted the truth of their being. pero kahit matapos lahat nang un, naisip ko lang na ang wierd na kaibigan ko parin siya. at mas wierd na mas kaya kong kausapin siya sa kahit ano compared sa taong kino-consider ko as best friend ko. tapos wala lang, naisip ko shet. grace. isa talaga siyang real blessing. god at work. at although minsan feel ko kina-calculate ko parin ang pag-galaw ko concerning siya, na parang binabasa ko pa mga galaw ko at galaw niya kung ano ba ang tama, astig lang na magkaibigan parin kami. salamat s.
isa ko pang naisip din. parang minsan, ang sad isipin kung bakit kailangan kalkulado mga galaw natin around friends. parang may status quo na kailangan tuparin at sundan. alam mo un. "masyado na ba akong nagiging close?". "crossing the line na ba to?". "masyado ko ba silang kinakausap? na ako na lang parati nagsisimula ng lahat? parang masyado sabik? sila kaya ganito rin ka taas ang effort na binibigay nila? wag ko kaya silang kausapin at hintayin kung may initiative silang ako kausapin una, parati na lang kasi ako eh?". alam mo un. parang ang non-friend ng thoughts, pero feel ko ganon din iniisip ng ibang tao. parang ang sad na naghahanap tayo ng kapalit, or in other words ma-reciprocate in the same degree ung level of intimacy na binibigay natin sa mga kaibigan natin. pero hindi ba dapat hindi na natin minimeasure un. parang kung kaibigan natin sila, sila na mismo kusang magbibigay non. or on the aspect of restraint, ang sad lang na minsan kailangan natin pigilan sarili natin or pigilan sila na... well... tanggalin ung mga maskara natin. (actually parang maskara din ung dating sakin nung maturity = "i'm strong" thing.) pero ewan. hindi rin eh. marming problemang lalabas pag hindi binitawan natin control. ang complicated talaga ng relationships (in general). i mean, fine madalas/minsan pede ka namang magenjoy lang at maging ikaw. pero minsan talaga... ewan. parang ang sad, na kailangan maging kalkulado galaw mo. parang pinaglalaruan mo sila, in a way. sana pedeng wag na lang?
minsan naiisip ko din parang ang distant ko sa mga kaibigan kong tinuturing kong pinakamalapit sakin. parang wala akong kaibigan na naiimbita sa kahit gabing gabi na tapos masabihan nang "gusto mo magkape at tumambay lang?" or "inom/chika tayo!". alam mo un. ung parang at a whim sasamahan ka, at ikaw rin mageeffort para samahan siya. plus ung issue na wala kang makausap dahil parang mature lahat nang tao. minsan tuloy iniisip ko, itong mga taong tinuturing kong best friend, or close na friend ba ay tunay na, on the universal standard, best/close friend ko talaga? o baka hindi ko pa nakikita ang magiging pinaka-malapit kong kaibigan talaga (excluding mga romantic relationships). mali ba na mageffort akong itago ang pagkakaibigan namin na parang ayaw kong bitawan? dapat bang makita ko ring nageeffort silang itago din to sa level na binibigay ko? o dapat bang keri lang, at kung ano na lang mangyari ay mangyayari baka kasi hindi pa sila ang magiging pinaka best friend mo? o baka naman hindi ko lang maintindihan ang grace, na grace talaga sila galing kay god at hindi ko lang magrasp kung gaano ako kaswerte na binigay sila ni god sakin. i mean grateful ako, pero ang tanong ay naiintindihan mo ba kung GAANO ka kaswerte na kaibigan mo sila. parang ganon.
anyfoo masyado na ata to mahaba. sige 2am na rin pala. haha. dapat nang matulog, pero di parin ako inaantok. XD anyfoo babershk~
*edit*
sige public na lang ang setting ng entry. as if naman may nagbabasa ng blog ko di ba LOL
sige na nga puta, sirain na natin ang pormalan. baka maglaho lang ang mga naisip ko. so gawin na lang nating ang feel niya ay parang chikahan lang at tambay kasama close friend/s at may hawak na kape or bote ng beer kung ano man mas feel mo. game.
so kausap kita, sabihin natin, at sha-share ko kung ano nasa isip ko. alam mo matagal ko nang iniisip, kung bakit parang ang restrained ng mga tao. ako kasi marami akong iniisip, minsan problema or minsan random stuff na nakukuha interest ko. pero usually, pag may significant akong concern gusto ko siya pagusapan. pero parang ang hirap ishare kasi ung mga taong ka-close mo, or mga taong kasama mo parang ang, having no other word for it, "mature". parang may oras na darating na biglang kailangan niyong maging strong. for example, si tin, alam ko stressed siya at nahihirapan pero di ko siya naririnig umimiik nang matindi na "puta ang hirap ng buhay ko". hindi ko alam kung, pag in-acknowledge mo ba ung fact na nahihirapan kayo ay mahihirapan talaga kayo or talagang gusto lang nilang i contain at ihandle sa sarili nila ung problem. at ako kahit na gusto ko pagusapan mga nangyayari sakin, na ishare siya sa isang taong komportable akong makipagchikahan tungkol sa kahit ano, parang napipigilan ako. parang nakakahiya na "ako lang ba ang immature dito?". na "ako lang ba ang hindi kayang handle ang nangyayari sa buhay ko?". alam ko kailangan ko ring tumanda in a sense, pero ewan. dapat nga ba maging matigas tayo? natural bang process to nang growth sa kultura ang society natin? di ko alam.
ung isa ko pang naisip, ay kung gaano ako kablessed. may isang lecture/homily kasi akong napuntahan last sunday. tapos ung isang idea na pinaliwanag nung pastor ay grace (love, grace, at hope). ngayon ako, honestly hindi ako zealous christian. sa totoo lang tingin ko wala akong kwentang christyano minsan (moral pero hindi gaano religious, or baka tingin ko lang). pero anyway maganda ung sinabi nung pastor on the idea of grace. sabi niya grace is god at work. at ang absence of grace ay man at work. anyway mag focus tayo sa grace = god at work. marami siyang sinabi eh, pero basically grace is something hard to comprehend. for example kung tayo raw, ung mga pumatay sa maguindanao massacre ay ikukulong natin. given the choice baka ipapatay pa natin sa death row. pero grace raw ay papatawarin natin sila, papakawalan, at siguro ipapavisit sa isang priest or pastor na makaka-inspire sa kanila to change. parang ang gago eh no. parang joke time. ikaw, tingin mo ba HONESTLY magbabago pa mga yan? asa. pero sabi niya, if you cannot understand grace then you have not received it yet. god at work, not man at work. so from there naisip ko lang ung isa kong kaibigan. na putang ina talaga ilang beses ko nang naka-away, inaway, insulted to a degree, even doubted the truth of their being. pero kahit matapos lahat nang un, naisip ko lang na ang wierd na kaibigan ko parin siya. at mas wierd na mas kaya kong kausapin siya sa kahit ano compared sa taong kino-consider ko as best friend ko. tapos wala lang, naisip ko shet. grace. isa talaga siyang real blessing. god at work. at although minsan feel ko kina-calculate ko parin ang pag-galaw ko concerning siya, na parang binabasa ko pa mga galaw ko at galaw niya kung ano ba ang tama, astig lang na magkaibigan parin kami. salamat s.
isa ko pang naisip din. parang minsan, ang sad isipin kung bakit kailangan kalkulado mga galaw natin around friends. parang may status quo na kailangan tuparin at sundan. alam mo un. "masyado na ba akong nagiging close?". "crossing the line na ba to?". "masyado ko ba silang kinakausap? na ako na lang parati nagsisimula ng lahat? parang masyado sabik? sila kaya ganito rin ka taas ang effort na binibigay nila? wag ko kaya silang kausapin at hintayin kung may initiative silang ako kausapin una, parati na lang kasi ako eh?". alam mo un. parang ang non-friend ng thoughts, pero feel ko ganon din iniisip ng ibang tao. parang ang sad na naghahanap tayo ng kapalit, or in other words ma-reciprocate in the same degree ung level of intimacy na binibigay natin sa mga kaibigan natin. pero hindi ba dapat hindi na natin minimeasure un. parang kung kaibigan natin sila, sila na mismo kusang magbibigay non. or on the aspect of restraint, ang sad lang na minsan kailangan natin pigilan sarili natin or pigilan sila na... well... tanggalin ung mga maskara natin. (actually parang maskara din ung dating sakin nung maturity = "i'm strong" thing.) pero ewan. hindi rin eh. marming problemang lalabas pag hindi binitawan natin control. ang complicated talaga ng relationships (in general). i mean, fine madalas/minsan pede ka namang magenjoy lang at maging ikaw. pero minsan talaga... ewan. parang ang sad, na kailangan maging kalkulado galaw mo. parang pinaglalaruan mo sila, in a way. sana pedeng wag na lang?
minsan naiisip ko din parang ang distant ko sa mga kaibigan kong tinuturing kong pinakamalapit sakin. parang wala akong kaibigan na naiimbita sa kahit gabing gabi na tapos masabihan nang "gusto mo magkape at tumambay lang?" or "inom/chika tayo!". alam mo un. ung parang at a whim sasamahan ka, at ikaw rin mageeffort para samahan siya. plus ung issue na wala kang makausap dahil parang mature lahat nang tao. minsan tuloy iniisip ko, itong mga taong tinuturing kong best friend, or close na friend ba ay tunay na, on the universal standard, best/close friend ko talaga? o baka hindi ko pa nakikita ang magiging pinaka-malapit kong kaibigan talaga (excluding mga romantic relationships). mali ba na mageffort akong itago ang pagkakaibigan namin na parang ayaw kong bitawan? dapat bang makita ko ring nageeffort silang itago din to sa level na binibigay ko? o dapat bang keri lang, at kung ano na lang mangyari ay mangyayari baka kasi hindi pa sila ang magiging pinaka best friend mo? o baka naman hindi ko lang maintindihan ang grace, na grace talaga sila galing kay god at hindi ko lang magrasp kung gaano ako kaswerte na binigay sila ni god sakin. i mean grateful ako, pero ang tanong ay naiintindihan mo ba kung GAANO ka kaswerte na kaibigan mo sila. parang ganon.
anyfoo masyado na ata to mahaba. sige 2am na rin pala. haha. dapat nang matulog, pero di parin ako inaantok. XD anyfoo babershk~
*edit*
sige public na lang ang setting ng entry. as if naman may nagbabasa ng blog ko di ba LOL
daming nang naganap sa totoo lang. limang linggo ba naman. hindi naman siguro ganon ka boring buhay ko na walang mangyayari ng isang buwan, na wala akong masusulat.
eto ok naman, ang buhay. "keri lang" ang ika ko nga. maraming bagay na nagbabago, lalo na ngayon hindi na lang mundo ng iba ang nagbago pati akin rin. kailangan nang umikot ng mundo. iniisip ko sa totoo lang kung ano na gagawin ko. gusto ko mag-aral ng nihongo at kumuha ng JLPT 2 next year. pero para gawin un kailangan ko mag-aral at sabi ng kaibigan ko (carlos) na sa PIJLC sa may manila raw mahusay mag-aral ng intensive course. as in tatalon raw ang alam ko. problema naman dun 9am-4pm siya each day so obviously bawal ako magfull-time na trabaho. aral lang talaga na may part-time ek ek here and there para sustain gastos ko. hindi ko alam kung gusto ko talaga to, pero alam ko na gusto kong umabot ako sa JLPT 2 at the very least. at alam kong habang mas lalo kong pinapatagal ang pag-aaral ng nihongo mas lalong maglalaho siya sa utak ko. ito ang risk.
ang kabilan option naman ay... *chadan* -- magtrabaho. di naman halata no? nararapat lang, at kinakailangan na magtrabaho na ako. sa totoo lang ok naman. iniisip ko lang, kung san saka ano. ang hirap kasi pumili kung di mo alam kung ano ba talaga hinahanap mo. ano ba talaga gusto mong gawin. dapat bang mag comp eng'g na trabaho ako dahil ito inaral ko? as in hardcore assembly language? o dapat bang magcompromise ako at umangat sa high level na languages kahit wala akong alam sa JAVA or what. C pede pa siguro pero ung iba talaga, tigang na lupa ang utak ko. o baka naman mas bagay ako sa hindi completely technical na trabaho. medyo managerial or what. iniisip ko din sa totoo lang maging teacher minsan. kahit part time. gusto ko lang subukan. may appeal kasi talaga sakin ang human interaction na work. saka may something na feeling mo may pinatutunguhan ginagawa mo pag nagtuturo ka. ung immediate sense of purpose. na may social relevance ang ginagawa mo at hindi vague na sense of social-obligation-na-bahala-ka-na-magcon
so ayan. other than that, ang major shiz na naganap na sakin... ay ok naman. minsan nakaka-emo. ngayon ko talaga nafefeel na iba na ang mundo ng barkada ko. pero wala nang point pang hawakan ang mga bagay na matagal nang wala. i mean di naman sa wala na siya, pero nagbago na. kailangan lang tanggapin mo na ganito na ang mga bagay bagay. wag maghanap ng bagay na wala. minsan lang kasi nakakalito -- di mo alam kung dapat bang mag-effort kang "ipaglaban" (in a sense) ang mga bagay (relationships in a general sense, among other things) or dapat bang bumitaw ka na lang at pabayaan mangyari ang mga nangyayari. hindi mo alam kung pointless na bang lumaban, o wala ka nang magagawa para sa mga nagaganap. lol. hassle. kaya ayaw ko nag-iisip minsan eh.
on a happier note, nagka-kotse ako bigla *chadan*. as in kotse ko na siya (although kahati ko si mic, pero di pa naman siya nagdridrive). nakakahiya nga kay ma. matagal na siyang nagsasabi na maghanap ako ng 2nd hand na sedan pero tinatamad lang ako plus ayaw ko din kasi nahihiya ako sa kanya. ayaw kong magbigay ng extra gastos na hindi ko naman talaga kailangan. i mean convenient na magkakotse ako, pero hindi siya necessity para sakin. pero ayun nung sunday naisip niyang dumaan sa bahay ng dealer naming kapitbahay. at kinabukasan may corolla 1998 na pula na kami. XD mukhang di na matutuloy plano ni mamang bumili ng LED TV na malaki ngayon pasko XD. nakakahiya talaga, pero matutuwa ka din. salamat mommy~ ♥ -- ang issue nga lang pala ay parking space. wala pa nga tong kotse na to wala nang parking space sa loob ng garahe. ngayong nadagdag pa to, nasa tabi ng kalsada 1 block away pa ako magpapark para hindi nakakahiya sa kapitbahay. XD hassle. pero kasama na rin sa package i guess.
ang haba na. XD ito na lang muna. anyfoo. babershk.
eto ok naman, ang buhay. "keri lang" ang ika ko nga. maraming bagay na nagbabago, lalo na ngayon hindi na lang mundo ng iba ang nagbago pati akin rin. kailangan nang umikot ng mundo. iniisip ko sa totoo lang kung ano na gagawin ko. gusto ko mag-aral ng nihongo at kumuha ng JLPT 2 next year. pero para gawin un kailangan ko mag-aral at sabi ng kaibigan ko (carlos) na sa PIJLC sa may manila raw mahusay mag-aral ng intensive course. as in tatalon raw ang alam ko. problema naman dun 9am-4pm siya each day so obviously bawal ako magfull-time na trabaho. aral lang talaga na may part-time ek ek here and there para sustain gastos ko. hindi ko alam kung gusto ko talaga to, pero alam ko na gusto kong umabot ako sa JLPT 2 at the very least. at alam kong habang mas lalo kong pinapatagal ang pag-aaral ng nihongo mas lalong maglalaho siya sa utak ko. ito ang risk.
ang kabilan option naman ay... *chadan* -- magtrabaho. di naman halata no? nararapat lang, at kinakailangan na magtrabaho na ako. sa totoo lang ok naman. iniisip ko lang, kung san saka ano. ang hirap kasi pumili kung di mo alam kung ano ba talaga hinahanap mo. ano ba talaga gusto mong gawin. dapat bang mag comp eng'g na trabaho ako dahil ito inaral ko? as in hardcore assembly language? o dapat bang magcompromise ako at umangat sa high level na languages kahit wala akong alam sa JAVA or what. C pede pa siguro pero ung iba talaga, tigang na lupa ang utak ko. o baka naman mas bagay ako sa hindi completely technical na trabaho. medyo managerial or what. iniisip ko din sa totoo lang maging teacher minsan. kahit part time. gusto ko lang subukan. may appeal kasi talaga sakin ang human interaction na work. saka may something na feeling mo may pinatutunguhan ginagawa mo pag nagtuturo ka. ung immediate sense of purpose. na may social relevance ang ginagawa mo at hindi vague na sense of social-obligation-na-bahala-ka-na-magcon
so ayan. other than that, ang major shiz na naganap na sakin... ay ok naman. minsan nakaka-emo. ngayon ko talaga nafefeel na iba na ang mundo ng barkada ko. pero wala nang point pang hawakan ang mga bagay na matagal nang wala. i mean di naman sa wala na siya, pero nagbago na. kailangan lang tanggapin mo na ganito na ang mga bagay bagay. wag maghanap ng bagay na wala. minsan lang kasi nakakalito -- di mo alam kung dapat bang mag-effort kang "ipaglaban" (in a sense) ang mga bagay (relationships in a general sense, among other things) or dapat bang bumitaw ka na lang at pabayaan mangyari ang mga nangyayari. hindi mo alam kung pointless na bang lumaban, o wala ka nang magagawa para sa mga nagaganap. lol. hassle. kaya ayaw ko nag-iisip minsan eh.
on a happier note, nagka-kotse ako bigla *chadan*. as in kotse ko na siya (although kahati ko si mic, pero di pa naman siya nagdridrive). nakakahiya nga kay ma. matagal na siyang nagsasabi na maghanap ako ng 2nd hand na sedan pero tinatamad lang ako plus ayaw ko din kasi nahihiya ako sa kanya. ayaw kong magbigay ng extra gastos na hindi ko naman talaga kailangan. i mean convenient na magkakotse ako, pero hindi siya necessity para sakin. pero ayun nung sunday naisip niyang dumaan sa bahay ng dealer naming kapitbahay. at kinabukasan may corolla 1998 na pula na kami. XD mukhang di na matutuloy plano ni mamang bumili ng LED TV na malaki ngayon pasko XD. nakakahiya talaga, pero matutuwa ka din. salamat mommy~ ♥ -- ang issue nga lang pala ay parking space. wala pa nga tong kotse na to wala nang parking space sa loob ng garahe. ngayong nadagdag pa to, nasa tabi ng kalsada 1 block away pa ako magpapark para hindi nakakahiya sa kapitbahay. XD hassle. pero kasama na rin sa package i guess.
ang haba na. XD ito na lang muna. anyfoo. babershk.
i woke up early today to finally get my driver's license. there was this issue last... oh... 2 months ago... or more... when i tried to have my license renewed, where the LTO person told me my ID was a fake. big shocker since i never dealt with any fixers or the like when i trudged through the slow and grueling process of getting your license, true to the system. and here i was having this old lady shoving my ID up wherever end most people say they do (would have been easier on me if she was young and cute). *evil stare*. anyway she told me that she can't process this, and that i had to head to LTO and do the whole thing all over again. gracious me, i'm filled with joy and anticipation. orz.
i forced myself to sleep early due to multiple reasons, this task included, and woke up at the wee hour of 5am. left home at around 715 and got to LTO east ave. branch close to 815 due to the horrible morning rush along commonwealth ave. the lazy employees opened their stations at around 9am, and i did the whole shiz of paying, waiting, picture taking, waiting, moving to the lecture room to review and wait, waiting, taking the test, waiting, moving to the practical exam waiting area to wait and do some more waiting, waiting, driving around, waiting, and lo and behold it was 1210pm. *internal supernova of frustrations* and so i had to slug it out with the hordes of people invading the fast food chains (namely jollibee) until the clock hit 100pm. and even the jollibee experience was HORRIBLE, but that's another story. anyway i got back to the LTO and after another hour of appreciation for government efficiency, i finally got to be reunited with my driver's license. *tear*.
i went home, took a breather, then i went out again to get my brother enrolled in his master's course in UP. he, along my sister and mom, got jettisoned to the US for some seminar for their work. so i got stuck with the enrollment and i-can't-attend-classes-yet errands for my bro. i tried to leave his letter at the environmental eng'g dep but the staff lady told me to give it to the respective professors of each class personally, making me beam with effervescent joy that i would have to return and do more errands for the rest of the week. then i went to pay for his tuition, but then the OUR payment lines already got cut off (it was just 330 wtf). i took my chances with the FC landbank but they didn't seem to notice the quiet desperation and anguish swelling up beneath my puppy eyes, and shooed me away. *tear*. so i went for the last option which is the SC PNB and was utterly relieved to find it still open... after noticing the mile long line from beyond the horizon. so from 400 to 515 i made like a turtle and eased my way along the lines till i finally got to finish the errand. on a positive note, there was this cute girl (chinita pa naman, shux, *faint*) a few paces behind me making the whole hour and a quarter worth it, one way or another.
after that i decided to put off buying dragon age: origins, since it might take up my drawing time, and went straight home. and that, my dear audience, ends this unusually busy day of mine.
babershk~
i forced myself to sleep early due to multiple reasons, this task included, and woke up at the wee hour of 5am. left home at around 715 and got to LTO east ave. branch close to 815 due to the horrible morning rush along commonwealth ave. the lazy employees opened their stations at around 9am, and i did the whole shiz of paying, waiting, picture taking, waiting, moving to the lecture room to review and wait, waiting, taking the test, waiting, moving to the practical exam waiting area to wait and do some more waiting, waiting, driving around, waiting, and lo and behold it was 1210pm. *internal supernova of frustrations* and so i had to slug it out with the hordes of people invading the fast food chains (namely jollibee) until the clock hit 100pm. and even the jollibee experience was HORRIBLE, but that's another story. anyway i got back to the LTO and after another hour of appreciation for government efficiency, i finally got to be reunited with my driver's license. *tear*.
i went home, took a breather, then i went out again to get my brother enrolled in his master's course in UP. he, along my sister and mom, got jettisoned to the US for some seminar for their work. so i got stuck with the enrollment and i-can't-attend-classes-yet errands for my bro. i tried to leave his letter at the environmental eng'g dep but the staff lady told me to give it to the respective professors of each class personally, making me beam with effervescent joy that i would have to return and do more errands for the rest of the week. then i went to pay for his tuition, but then the OUR payment lines already got cut off (it was just 330 wtf). i took my chances with the FC landbank but they didn't seem to notice the quiet desperation and anguish swelling up beneath my puppy eyes, and shooed me away. *tear*. so i went for the last option which is the SC PNB and was utterly relieved to find it still open... after noticing the mile long line from beyond the horizon. so from 400 to 515 i made like a turtle and eased my way along the lines till i finally got to finish the errand. on a positive note, there was this cute girl (chinita pa naman, shux, *faint*) a few paces behind me making the whole hour and a quarter worth it, one way or another.
after that i decided to put off buying dragon age: origins, since it might take up my drawing time, and went straight home. and that, my dear audience, ends this unusually busy day of mine.
babershk~
it (the title) doesn't really have much on the entry as a whole... but i did promise to kick up the ante a notch, so i'm just living up to my absurd promises even though i'm ruining the whole point. but hey, it tickled my creativity, and i bet it had you by the balls (if you had one... or two) for that brief (pun intended) moment.
so i was supposed to write this yester-night but the net started having hiccups and those, along with gaming frustrations in between, didn't really bring forth the literary spirit within. anyway, the net is alive and kicking now and with my writing powers tingling at the fingertips i'd better not waste the moment and keep the fans waiting! (as if may nagbabasa nito 'di ba. but hey i'm having fun making my own fun... so... yeah, whuppee fun. haha. )
so yesterday was tin's birthday bash. not quite the epic bash that the word tends to imply in a physical sense (moot celebratory population and all) but epic it still was with all the fun and joy that a bag of nips can bring (rainbows anyone?). but really, i never had that much fun in a long long time. i've always been telling nina, my confidant in everything and anything life, how much i miss everyone and how we should go out and do something, or anything, to keep the social ties from burning out. i mean not that they'd actually burn out, but you get the point. anyway so we did, and it was better than i hoped for.
haha it sounds like i'm in this social abyss -- deprived, wanting, and desperate (at least to myself). and truly to some extent it is, but yesterday was so much fun (with so much food) that i left as satisfied as a pooh bear neck deep in a honey tree. i was thinking that maybe after hanging out with my friends that i'd be missing them and thinking about when we'd be able to go out again. it's social abyss SOP. but i clearly underestimated the power of plain old friendship. it's weird, in a refreshing morphine-induced-heaven kind of way. it could have just gone forever, us sitting there and hanging out, and i wouldn't have minded it if we did for all eternity. and even when we couldn't, i still didn't feel like my fun got spoiled. my social needs and welfare bank got it's monthly deposit and i genuinely felt like a million bucks.
on a snippet stories kind of note, we finally got to see tin's place. it wasn't big but she was settled in and doing fine so i guess it's ok. suportahan taka. it was interesting to learn more about people. seeing a part of her daily routine made me feel how late i am in the game of real life living and to think she's 2 years my junior (well now it's 1... gee i feel better already). my god. i live a too comfortable and screwed up life. i really need to get the gears oiled and checked. XD
anyway. more food awaited me once i hit my humble abode. pizza and pasta. like i haven't had enough of it from lunch and post-lunch. then mom finally arrived from china~♥ yay! moar chocolates for me. and if you didn't get your chance to sucker the resident candy man into giving you free treats, well at least now i'm restocked and ready for another run of endorphine charity.
i'm over doing it already so i'll end it here. but yeah. it was fun. :3
P.S.
there was this awkward talk about legs/feet last time. and i was laughing and flushing bright red in embarrassment, but in all honesty i didn't hear what the leg/feet thing was actually about. idiot. XD
oh and the title is actually in reference to the gift we gave tin. cute little thing really. we thought it fit the celebrant perfectly considering she's as pale as snow white and is generally considered to be an angel, until you unfortunately get to know her better. haha. *peace*
*update*
i finally looked up the leg/foot word in the urban dictionary. made me lol.
so i was supposed to write this yester-night but the net started having hiccups and those, along with gaming frustrations in between, didn't really bring forth the literary spirit within. anyway, the net is alive and kicking now and with my writing powers tingling at the fingertips i'd better not waste the moment and keep the fans waiting! (as if may nagbabasa nito 'di ba. but hey i'm having fun making my own fun... so... yeah, whuppee fun. haha. )
so yesterday was tin's birthday bash. not quite the epic bash that the word tends to imply in a physical sense (moot celebratory population and all) but epic it still was with all the fun and joy that a bag of nips can bring (rainbows anyone?). but really, i never had that much fun in a long long time. i've always been telling nina, my confidant in everything and anything life, how much i miss everyone and how we should go out and do something, or anything, to keep the social ties from burning out. i mean not that they'd actually burn out, but you get the point. anyway so we did, and it was better than i hoped for.
haha it sounds like i'm in this social abyss -- deprived, wanting, and desperate (at least to myself). and truly to some extent it is, but yesterday was so much fun (with so much food) that i left as satisfied as a pooh bear neck deep in a honey tree. i was thinking that maybe after hanging out with my friends that i'd be missing them and thinking about when we'd be able to go out again. it's social abyss SOP. but i clearly underestimated the power of plain old friendship. it's weird, in a refreshing morphine-induced-heaven kind of way. it could have just gone forever, us sitting there and hanging out, and i wouldn't have minded it if we did for all eternity. and even when we couldn't, i still didn't feel like my fun got spoiled. my social needs and welfare bank got it's monthly deposit and i genuinely felt like a million bucks.
on a snippet stories kind of note, we finally got to see tin's place. it wasn't big but she was settled in and doing fine so i guess it's ok. suportahan taka. it was interesting to learn more about people. seeing a part of her daily routine made me feel how late i am in the game of real life living and to think she's 2 years my junior (well now it's 1... gee i feel better already). my god. i live a too comfortable and screwed up life. i really need to get the gears oiled and checked. XD
anyway. more food awaited me once i hit my humble abode. pizza and pasta. like i haven't had enough of it from lunch and post-lunch. then mom finally arrived from china~♥ yay! moar chocolates for me. and if you didn't get your chance to sucker the resident candy man into giving you free treats, well at least now i'm restocked and ready for another run of endorphine charity.
i'm over doing it already so i'll end it here. but yeah. it was fun. :3
P.S.
there was this awkward talk about legs/feet last time. and i was laughing and flushing bright red in embarrassment, but in all honesty i didn't hear what the leg/feet thing was actually about. idiot. XD
oh and the title is actually in reference to the gift we gave tin. cute little thing really. we thought it fit the celebrant perfectly considering she's as pale as snow white and is generally considered to be an angel, until you unfortunately get to know her better. haha. *peace*
*update*
i finally looked up the leg/foot word in the urban dictionary. made me lol.
yesterday evening was a quite different from the usually boring and uneventful nights i tend to trudge through. my bro called and asked me if he could drag me along to help out one of our friends push his car. apparently the bloke parked his car on muddy field by the fishball vendor at the UP Vanguard -- not one of his best ideas considering the frequent rains. and yes to our complete and utter surprise we didn't foresee the immense possibility that he might, on the rare freak chance, get his car stuck in the mud. so yeah, he pulled out the friend card, and off we went to save the day.
but that really isn't what the title is all about. it was the car ride going there. i don't really get to do the catch-up talk with my bro often. he leaves early and works till late, so it doesn't really leave much room for anything aside from the standard hi's and hello's. anyway, the car. so he was doing the big bro thing and asking how things were. and it was ok, until he started asking about plans, and everything: where to work, what do you want to do, etc. and i didn't really have a definitive answer that i could give him with confidence. i never really thought about it much. i'm not the type. and yet when i asked him how things were with him, he gave me all sorts of plans and possibilities he had going. and i felt uncomfortable and somewhat insecure with my lack of a future.
thinking about it, i think it's my lack of ambition that's the reason why it seems my life is isn't really going anywhere. it's like i can't look past what where i am now. not that i can't i just don't really have the passion or reason to do so. i know i should, but i just don't feel like it. i can't really fully reason it out, but the best way i can explain it to myself would be that i simply don't care right now. and that lack of vision and motivation is what binds me to this stagnancy.
i'm trying to think of something to pull this ending up. but right now, i can't really think of anything witty to throw at you. so i guess i'll just leave it with a 'till next time' thing. babershk.
but that really isn't what the title is all about. it was the car ride going there. i don't really get to do the catch-up talk with my bro often. he leaves early and works till late, so it doesn't really leave much room for anything aside from the standard hi's and hello's. anyway, the car. so he was doing the big bro thing and asking how things were. and it was ok, until he started asking about plans, and everything: where to work, what do you want to do, etc. and i didn't really have a definitive answer that i could give him with confidence. i never really thought about it much. i'm not the type. and yet when i asked him how things were with him, he gave me all sorts of plans and possibilities he had going. and i felt uncomfortable and somewhat insecure with my lack of a future.
thinking about it, i think it's my lack of ambition that's the reason why it seems my life is isn't really going anywhere. it's like i can't look past what where i am now. not that i can't i just don't really have the passion or reason to do so. i know i should, but i just don't feel like it. i can't really fully reason it out, but the best way i can explain it to myself would be that i simply don't care right now. and that lack of vision and motivation is what binds me to this stagnancy.
i'm trying to think of something to pull this ending up. but right now, i can't really think of anything witty to throw at you. so i guess i'll just leave it with a 'till next time' thing. babershk.
yeah i know i'm bad with titles, but technically speaking this one fits the bill perfectly as titles go. boring... but yeah i'll just make up for the blandness next time. and so, go forth we shall (moving on? corny no. wala ako maisip eh. haha. yes yes, more corn than iowa, i know.)
so i've been hitting the books with ardent dedication as of late, trying to really absorb the 250 characters i'm currently required to know by heart for the sankyuu test. and i realize, as history has taught me numerous times before, i suck at memorization. i was bad at it in grade school history class, i still hide in shame when i forget names and birthdays, and i will be bad on anything memoriy-ish from here on and hence forth. it just requires too much practice to get these things into your system and i am in contrast an 'understanding' kind of learner which, picks off from a different set of skills. i a hear-it-once-or-twice-and-i-get-it kind of person. i don't memorize equations, i usually derive them or create weird ways to find the answer i need. true, i can still use some of these analytic skills on kanji: mixing and matching the radicals to help me associate the meanings, linking the radicals to the onyomi and kunyomi pronunciations, etc. but beyond any skill or talent you may have, you need practice. practice makes perfect. and for lazy people like me, practice doesn't really come in as a ready option. but what the hell, i'm trying. XD
i finally decided to finally push through with my plans to finally get a new haircut. finally. after like a gazillion times to telling myself that for like... oh, years. i've done my research and everything: tony and jackey's sm north, short simple but relatively stylish hair sported by ueno juri in last friends -- may require hair straightening but god forbid that it should come to that. i'm still hesitant about getting my hair straightened. i like my wavy hair, and i although i have an abundant share of the vane streak i take enough pride in what i naturally sport to want to change it. that and i might risking looking like a fag by accident in case the plan goes down under. and so... yeah. i'm scared XD. but i'll push through with it. may the fashion gods save me from turning into a metro abomination.
so i've been hitting the books with ardent dedication as of late, trying to really absorb the 250 characters i'm currently required to know by heart for the sankyuu test. and i realize, as history has taught me numerous times before, i suck at memorization. i was bad at it in grade school history class, i still hide in shame when i forget names and birthdays, and i will be bad on anything memoriy-ish from here on and hence forth. it just requires too much practice to get these things into your system and i am in contrast an 'understanding' kind of learner which, picks off from a different set of skills. i a hear-it-once-or-twice-and-i-get-it kind of person. i don't memorize equations, i usually derive them or create weird ways to find the answer i need. true, i can still use some of these analytic skills on kanji: mixing and matching the radicals to help me associate the meanings, linking the radicals to the onyomi and kunyomi pronunciations, etc. but beyond any skill or talent you may have, you need practice. practice makes perfect. and for lazy people like me, practice doesn't really come in as a ready option. but what the hell, i'm trying. XD
i finally decided to finally push through with my plans to finally get a new haircut. finally. after like a gazillion times to telling myself that for like... oh, years. i've done my research and everything: tony and jackey's sm north, short simple but relatively stylish hair sported by ueno juri in last friends -- may require hair straightening but god forbid that it should come to that. i'm still hesitant about getting my hair straightened. i like my wavy hair, and i although i have an abundant share of the vane streak i take enough pride in what i naturally sport to want to change it. that and i might risking looking like a fag by accident in case the plan goes down under. and so... yeah. i'm scared XD. but i'll push through with it. may the fashion gods save me from turning into a metro abomination.
today leaned more on the irresponsibly negligent, indulgent, and by-gosh-who-gives-a-crap. i forgot to set my alarm, although i did wake up at the blessed hour of 630, but failed miserably in trying to pry myself away from the deadly and sinfully pleasant clutches of my bed (i blame the cool morning rain and the warm blanket). i gained consciousness 2 and a half hours later, in the dream-jerking shock of realizing i might have slept in a little bit too much, which turned out to actually be an oh-shit-it's-nine-already. very unpleasant, but it gets the nerves into gear. however it all goes to waste, both my sleeping-in and nastily waking up, because i decided not to go to jap class and just do the home study full review i've been meaning to pull off.
studying kanji is frustrating stuff. really. it is. it FOREVER resides on your short term memory banks and yet never finds its way into the good graces of your long term storage where it's supposed to be. you study the character a week before, hear the word a week later, and you'll most likely be going "...wut?" for minutes (or even hours) trying to pick out those set of squiglly set of lines out of your brain. it's so hard to actively pull it out of your head without any form of stimulation or clue as to what you're looking for. for example looking at some characters and remembering what they are is a completely different ball game from being told to write stuff out of the blue. the latter is a billion times more difficult. i should be taking comfort in knowing that my nihongo god only knew roughly 100 characters when he took the test which required him to know 300 and passed it at 98%, but meh you have to start on it eventually. so yeah, i'll take the advice, but i don't have to like it. *dies from brain cell meltdown*
so trying to save a few neurons from an early grave, i took my friend's advice and took a break. maybe a few minutes or so would do me good. not really in the mood for gaming i decided to read one of the books my older bro was nudging into my free time, The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher. i couldn't find the first book (or maybe my bro didn't really have it yet) so i decided to begin the adventure a little bit ahead with the second. 5 hours later i put down the novel wanting to pick up the next one.
the book was simply awesome. it's about this rugged, broke, and amusing wizard who lives in modern day chicago and gets by as a consultant to the special investigations unit of the chicago police department, battling meanie mages, demons or whatever the nevernever decides to pull out of its dark depths. i was laughing (with quick checks on the bedroom door to save me the embarrassment from passersby) at all the witty remarks, loving the action, and relishing the beauty of its fiction. it really is a good book, and it will really weave its magic on you if you let yourself indulge in it. highly recommended if you're into fiction, or even just want a good entertaining read. can't wait to read the next book in the series, at least after i finish reviewing a few dozen kanji... XD.
to be able to pour your thoughts into something readily is such a pleasant convenience to have. maybe it's because of the increasing lack of people to talk to and hang out with that i'm being forced to write, but honestly it gives me a different kind of comfort and relief. things you can't really say properly, but things you can take your time to think about and layout before you in words. words you don't use in real life in arrangements that would would be excessively overboard when said, yet fits perfectly in the empty spaces of the digital slate. it's freedom coupled with good doses of fun. and i'd be darned if you can't see how much fun i'm having here.
but this is already a bit too long for the usual stuff, so i'll end it here. till next time then. babershk~
studying kanji is frustrating stuff. really. it is. it FOREVER resides on your short term memory banks and yet never finds its way into the good graces of your long term storage where it's supposed to be. you study the character a week before, hear the word a week later, and you'll most likely be going "...wut?" for minutes (or even hours) trying to pick out those set of squiglly set of lines out of your brain. it's so hard to actively pull it out of your head without any form of stimulation or clue as to what you're looking for. for example looking at some characters and remembering what they are is a completely different ball game from being told to write stuff out of the blue. the latter is a billion times more difficult. i should be taking comfort in knowing that my nihongo god only knew roughly 100 characters when he took the test which required him to know 300 and passed it at 98%, but meh you have to start on it eventually. so yeah, i'll take the advice, but i don't have to like it. *dies from brain cell meltdown*
so trying to save a few neurons from an early grave, i took my friend's advice and took a break. maybe a few minutes or so would do me good. not really in the mood for gaming i decided to read one of the books my older bro was nudging into my free time, The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher. i couldn't find the first book (or maybe my bro didn't really have it yet) so i decided to begin the adventure a little bit ahead with the second. 5 hours later i put down the novel wanting to pick up the next one.
the book was simply awesome. it's about this rugged, broke, and amusing wizard who lives in modern day chicago and gets by as a consultant to the special investigations unit of the chicago police department, battling meanie mages, demons or whatever the nevernever decides to pull out of its dark depths. i was laughing (with quick checks on the bedroom door to save me the embarrassment from passersby) at all the witty remarks, loving the action, and relishing the beauty of its fiction. it really is a good book, and it will really weave its magic on you if you let yourself indulge in it. highly recommended if you're into fiction, or even just want a good entertaining read. can't wait to read the next book in the series, at least after i finish reviewing a few dozen kanji... XD.
to be able to pour your thoughts into something readily is such a pleasant convenience to have. maybe it's because of the increasing lack of people to talk to and hang out with that i'm being forced to write, but honestly it gives me a different kind of comfort and relief. things you can't really say properly, but things you can take your time to think about and layout before you in words. words you don't use in real life in arrangements that would would be excessively overboard when said, yet fits perfectly in the empty spaces of the digital slate. it's freedom coupled with good doses of fun. and i'd be darned if you can't see how much fun i'm having here.
but this is already a bit too long for the usual stuff, so i'll end it here. till next time then. babershk~
so just this monday morning i went out to help in the relief efforts for the victims of ondoy. although UP has alot of organizations wanting to help out i was a bit irked by the fact that they choose to remain individual in their efforts to help out rather than band together as on collective group to focus the efforts of the University. CSSP, office of the chancellor, Bio -- you name it. it's like spreading the work force, each group only being able to do so much with the little human resources they have and the amount of relief goods they'll be recieving from each of their individual circles. and so not wanting to get disappointed and potentially irritated i set off for ADMU instead.
i was hesitant at first in truth. although i do want to help out physically going there alone, with no friends to keep you company, is lonely and awkward specially for introverts like moi. shy kung shy kumbaga. but work had to be done and help was badly needed (or so i thought, daming tao kasi talaga eh) so pushing my apprehesions aside i went anyway.
there were a LOT of people to say the least. i saw a few familiar faces (and that's a big thing considering the only people i know from ateneo are from my GS and HS days) and was fortunate enough to find marco (yay i had company) who was with a friend from work. the main thing that grabbed my attention other than the amount of people present, which truly is amazing to say the least, is the sheer amount of resources coming in minute by minute -- food, clothes, volunteered vehicles, toiletries, medicine -- you name it they have it. granted it is a mainly middle-upper class community, but still the influence and capability of Ateneo as an institution, never ceases to amaze me. corporate sponsors, proper organization for logistics, the sheer amount of cars, and the power to draw in so many people to donate and help out is just amazing.
however looking volunteering in ateneo does show you another aspect of the work force that you wouldn't normally expect in situations like this -- that being the who and how many people are helping out. to me, in all honesty, to see so many people helping out specially the youth of the middle and even more so, those from the upper classes of society is just... well, weird. the fact that these people would go to volunteer and do dirty, sweaty, hard labor in their saturday night best just proves the point even more. and although it probably is because of the range of people affected by the typhoon, affects all classes of society with equal intensity that the youth can finally see first hand the reality of it all, i still cannot take credit away from them even though some of these people's intentions might not be as pure as the elitist me would prefer. the fact is, they are out here helping out and their help be it in any form is very much welcome in this time of need.
on my part, i didn't really do much. i, along with 8 or so other people, made a stack of 1000 food packs to be put into standby for dispatching, helped out in transferring goods in the assembly lines, helped pack clothes into boxes, among other things -- always being thrown around after each minor job. it was tiring stuff, but fun. sabi ko nga kay marco 'parang cheer rally lang ah' noting the atmosphere and morale of the people present.
day 2 wasn't too different. this time i went there alone, which was a bit tough on my part because the only thing that would be keeping you there to stay and help would be only be your sheer will to help. and although i really did want to help, not having any friends to keep me comfortably rooted in that community of people was hard XD. more so that i'm practically an outsider and not really as gregarious as i would have liked to be. in any case i left at around lunch time after doing pretty much the same random stuff as the day before.
today i'll take a break from volunteer work. mainly because the 'helping-out-alone' experience was just really taxing to me psychologically and emotionally. lol. but yeah, really, i'd rather help out again with someone i know so that i wouldn't feel that alienated and would be able to stay longer to help out.
we still got the week left. let's do et.
ay, ay! i'm not sure if it will still hold true for the rest of the week, but there was truly an unhealthy excess of people helping out in the more known locations like ABS-CBN and ADMU to the point that people were just hanging out (in ADMU) and trolling the court grounds (which was one of the reasons why i left early yesterday -- feel ko sagabal na lang ako). so i guess helping out in other locations where more man power might be needed would be more productive for everyone. ge babershk na talaga. ciao.
i was hesitant at first in truth. although i do want to help out physically going there alone, with no friends to keep you company, is lonely and awkward specially for introverts like moi. shy kung shy kumbaga. but work had to be done and help was badly needed (or so i thought, daming tao kasi talaga eh) so pushing my apprehesions aside i went anyway.
there were a LOT of people to say the least. i saw a few familiar faces (and that's a big thing considering the only people i know from ateneo are from my GS and HS days) and was fortunate enough to find marco (yay i had company) who was with a friend from work. the main thing that grabbed my attention other than the amount of people present, which truly is amazing to say the least, is the sheer amount of resources coming in minute by minute -- food, clothes, volunteered vehicles, toiletries, medicine -- you name it they have it. granted it is a mainly middle-upper class community, but still the influence and capability of Ateneo as an institution, never ceases to amaze me. corporate sponsors, proper organization for logistics, the sheer amount of cars, and the power to draw in so many people to donate and help out is just amazing.
however looking volunteering in ateneo does show you another aspect of the work force that you wouldn't normally expect in situations like this -- that being the who and how many people are helping out. to me, in all honesty, to see so many people helping out specially the youth of the middle and even more so, those from the upper classes of society is just... well, weird. the fact that these people would go to volunteer and do dirty, sweaty, hard labor in their saturday night best just proves the point even more. and although it probably is because of the range of people affected by the typhoon, affects all classes of society with equal intensity that the youth can finally see first hand the reality of it all, i still cannot take credit away from them even though some of these people's intentions might not be as pure as the elitist me would prefer. the fact is, they are out here helping out and their help be it in any form is very much welcome in this time of need.
on my part, i didn't really do much. i, along with 8 or so other people, made a stack of 1000 food packs to be put into standby for dispatching, helped out in transferring goods in the assembly lines, helped pack clothes into boxes, among other things -- always being thrown around after each minor job. it was tiring stuff, but fun. sabi ko nga kay marco 'parang cheer rally lang ah' noting the atmosphere and morale of the people present.
day 2 wasn't too different. this time i went there alone, which was a bit tough on my part because the only thing that would be keeping you there to stay and help would be only be your sheer will to help. and although i really did want to help, not having any friends to keep me comfortably rooted in that community of people was hard XD. more so that i'm practically an outsider and not really as gregarious as i would have liked to be. in any case i left at around lunch time after doing pretty much the same random stuff as the day before.
today i'll take a break from volunteer work. mainly because the 'helping-out-alone' experience was just really taxing to me psychologically and emotionally. lol. but yeah, really, i'd rather help out again with someone i know so that i wouldn't feel that alienated and would be able to stay longer to help out.
we still got the week left. let's do et.
ay, ay! i'm not sure if it will still hold true for the rest of the week, but there was truly an unhealthy excess of people helping out in the more known locations like ABS-CBN and ADMU to the point that people were just hanging out (in ADMU) and trolling the court grounds (which was one of the reasons why i left early yesterday -- feel ko sagabal na lang ako). so i guess helping out in other locations where more man power might be needed would be more productive for everyone. ge babershk na talaga. ciao.
so kakatapos ko lang ng series ng proposal daisakusen. kailan ko lang siya talaga na download at pinanood lahat, sa totoo lang kakatapos ko lang mapanood talaga ang huling yugto at hanggang ngayon medyo sumisinghot pa ako ng uhog at nagpupunas parin ng luha sa kakaiyak. haha, nakakahiya talaga kasi naka headphones ako sa harap ng pc, hindi pa ako talaga nagaayos mula sa pagkagising ko, mukha talaga akong yagit, at eto ako umiiyak na hindi mo maintindihan. hindi siya isang bagay na makikita mo sa akin talaga -- ang pag iyak. hindi ko naman sinasabing manhid akong tao pero, madalas tingin ko sa sarili ko mas madalas na hindi ako nagpapa-apekto at naaapektuhan ng mga bagay bagay kaysa sa oo. minsan parang naiisip ko tuloy sa sarili ko parang manhid ko na tipong nakakabastos na, yung para bang wala kang pakialam sa nangyayari sa iba, pero ganon lang kasi talaga.
pero ewan ko ba. parang pasok na pasok talaga ung mga bagay bagay na nangyayari. well siguro naman kaya siya sumikat kasi maraming bagay na nasa kwento na universal talaga ang mga issues na gusto nyang sagutin. pero nakakatawa lang na parang maraming tao ang may pinagdaanang ganito, na makakarelate ka kahit papaano sa mga nangyayari. ang galing lang. ung madadala ka talaga ng dorama sa kabuuan nya. tipong marinig ko lang ung piano ng theme song ng series, nadadala na ako agad -- as in nahihila talaga ako.
nakakatawa lang din na minsan kailangan pa talaga ng mga dorama para marealize ng mga tao ang kailangan nilang gawin. pero bobo din naman kasi ang mga tao kahit na may utak sila. kailangan may bonggang pangyayari pa para matulak nila ang sarili nilang gawin ang dapat. or para lang maconvince sila na ang matagal nilang iniisip na sagot, ay ang sagot talaga. nakakatawa lang. well at least na entertain ka na sa pinapanood mo at may natutunan ka rin kahit papaano. haha. ang wierd lang talaga. matagal na kasi akong nakakapanood ng mga dorama pero mas anime kasi ang hilig ko. ang wierd lang na mas nafefeel ko tong mga bagay bagay dahil totoo tao pinapanood ko at hindi lang mga drawing. un na siguro talaga ang pagkakaiba ng media nila.
anyway. maganda ung series. promise. kung di mo pa napapanood panoorin nyo. as in. kung may oras lang ako kahapon talaga mula ep 3 hanggang ep 11 tinapos ko na sya. pero ung bimonthly meeting naming magpipinsan kasi nasaktong kahapon plus birthday din ni sandy, kapatid ni jaime, tapos non kaya nawalan ako ng oras manood. anyway, maganda. promise. manood kayo. lol.
babershk.
P.S.
may special pa pala sila pero d ko pa pinapanood kasi mahirap nang umiyak ako ng todo todo hahahaha. nahihiya na ako para sa sarili ko eh. mamayang gabi na lang pag medyo tulog na mga tao :P
pero ewan ko ba. parang pasok na pasok talaga ung mga bagay bagay na nangyayari. well siguro naman kaya siya sumikat kasi maraming bagay na nasa kwento na universal talaga ang mga issues na gusto nyang sagutin. pero nakakatawa lang na parang maraming tao ang may pinagdaanang ganito, na makakarelate ka kahit papaano sa mga nangyayari. ang galing lang. ung madadala ka talaga ng dorama sa kabuuan nya. tipong marinig ko lang ung piano ng theme song ng series, nadadala na ako agad -- as in nahihila talaga ako.
nakakatawa lang din na minsan kailangan pa talaga ng mga dorama para marealize ng mga tao ang kailangan nilang gawin. pero bobo din naman kasi ang mga tao kahit na may utak sila. kailangan may bonggang pangyayari pa para matulak nila ang sarili nilang gawin ang dapat. or para lang maconvince sila na ang matagal nilang iniisip na sagot, ay ang sagot talaga. nakakatawa lang. well at least na entertain ka na sa pinapanood mo at may natutunan ka rin kahit papaano. haha. ang wierd lang talaga. matagal na kasi akong nakakapanood ng mga dorama pero mas anime kasi ang hilig ko. ang wierd lang na mas nafefeel ko tong mga bagay bagay dahil totoo tao pinapanood ko at hindi lang mga drawing. un na siguro talaga ang pagkakaiba ng media nila.
anyway. maganda ung series. promise. kung di mo pa napapanood panoorin nyo. as in. kung may oras lang ako kahapon talaga mula ep 3 hanggang ep 11 tinapos ko na sya. pero ung bimonthly meeting naming magpipinsan kasi nasaktong kahapon plus birthday din ni sandy, kapatid ni jaime, tapos non kaya nawalan ako ng oras manood. anyway, maganda. promise. manood kayo. lol.
babershk.
P.S.
may special pa pala sila pero d ko pa pinapanood kasi mahirap nang umiyak ako ng todo todo hahahaha. nahihiya na ako para sa sarili ko eh. mamayang gabi na lang pag medyo tulog na mga tao :P
i was surprised to see that it's been 2 weeks (or so) since my last entry, and inspired by the spirit of blog diligence and simply just wanting to get the counter back to nill here i am doing the internet god's blessed work -- giving you useless but relatively entertaining info. so, updates.
well something significant happened to me socially. i lost a friend by choice for the first time, practically at least, since direct contact has been banned completely. i can't really say precisely why, but it's mainly my inability to accept the person as they are in their entirety -- good and bad. to you the faults tend to float up to the surface, even though everything is completely innocent. well maybe that bad trait really is at work and you just can't stop a vein from bursting, or you're just tainting the words with your second guessing and overly analytic social skills. either way it's not working. it makes me feel like it's bringing out the evil me that i don't want to see. the person deserves better, so here we are in isolation hoping it works out for the best.
the past week has been punctuated with parties day after day. well not literally, but it practically amounts to the same thing.
monday (the last national holiday) was my cousin's birthday. madison grill in greenbelt 5 was the place to be at 630pm. a bit of a transportation crisis for the navarro kids, but we made it relatively on time filipino time-wise at around 7pm. posh place with a 4 course dinner and good wine to go with it. it was the first time i've eaten a dory and it was definitely odd but interesting to know that our finding nemo star is posh-worthy for classy dining. small talk and a bit of catching up, and we're bouncing back home at around 930pm.
friday was district 9 day with friends. good movie, and surprisingly good acting from a first time lead actor (didn't take note of his name). the biped was a complete geekasm -- very awesome -- and it made me want to draw RF stuff again, if at least till a night's sleep mulled the gusto by morning.
saturday was hell. originally we planned it to have josine and meme's late birthday bash with a bit of cine europa viewing and lunch to go with it. supposedly we were meeting at 1000am, and i being the trying-too-hard-don't-want-to-dissapoint person that i am, i made an effort to be extra punctual and arrived to the second (well, minutes actually but second just makes you empathize with me more LOL) -- 10:03 to be exact. everyone else practically arrived between 11:20 and 100pm. great. really. very very frustrating and infuriating. anyway, they arrived late (malamang 'di ba) for the movie, so we "early" people decided to just settle down for lunch instead. was fun hanging out with the barkada again, but circumstances pushed me to leave early. a friend had a house blessing and post-grad graduation party in las pinas for lunch that same day. since it's been 2 years since i last saw these people, and with my other friends screwing up my mood and alotted time-frame, i decided to leave early on the first party and arrive late on the second. i met up with carlos in the shaw station and 2 hours later, under commuting stress and lame tv programming choice in the bus ride, we arrived at ix's place. good food, booze, karaoke and old but familiar faces. it was a bit awkward for me at first but it turned out to be entertaining in its own way.
sunday was my sister's birthday. had the same people from last monday's party come over, with a slightly less fancy but more homey feel to the celebration since we were having it at home. watched kimmy dora later that night after much coercion from my cousins, which turned out to be a bad call since the movie sucked imo. waste of time.
i wasn't able to go to class last monday, which turned out to be a bad call because when i went to nihongo class the following day we apparently were having a big test that very moment. clueless and with close to zilch stock knowledge. whupee. taena. as in. well anyway it goes to say that i bombed that one in epic proportions.
so now... well, things are ok i guess. oh, i've been watching this j-dorama series hirayama sensei introduced to us in class. the title is suika, and it's a pretty good drama, comedy, slice of life series. i'd give it a 8/10. watch it!
my creative juices and literary wit has just been drained completely (obvious naman ata LOL, nagiging dull na mga sentences ko) so i guess i'll end it here. mas sanay lang ako mag hop from english to tagalog much like in casual conversations, although masaya din magsulat na ingles lang. anyfoo babershk~
well something significant happened to me socially. i lost a friend by choice for the first time, practically at least, since direct contact has been banned completely. i can't really say precisely why, but it's mainly my inability to accept the person as they are in their entirety -- good and bad. to you the faults tend to float up to the surface, even though everything is completely innocent. well maybe that bad trait really is at work and you just can't stop a vein from bursting, or you're just tainting the words with your second guessing and overly analytic social skills. either way it's not working. it makes me feel like it's bringing out the evil me that i don't want to see. the person deserves better, so here we are in isolation hoping it works out for the best.
the past week has been punctuated with parties day after day. well not literally, but it practically amounts to the same thing.
monday (the last national holiday) was my cousin's birthday. madison grill in greenbelt 5 was the place to be at 630pm. a bit of a transportation crisis for the navarro kids, but we made it relatively on time filipino time-wise at around 7pm. posh place with a 4 course dinner and good wine to go with it. it was the first time i've eaten a dory and it was definitely odd but interesting to know that our finding nemo star is posh-worthy for classy dining. small talk and a bit of catching up, and we're bouncing back home at around 930pm.
friday was district 9 day with friends. good movie, and surprisingly good acting from a first time lead actor (didn't take note of his name). the biped was a complete geekasm -- very awesome -- and it made me want to draw RF stuff again, if at least till a night's sleep mulled the gusto by morning.
saturday was hell. originally we planned it to have josine and meme's late birthday bash with a bit of cine europa viewing and lunch to go with it. supposedly we were meeting at 1000am, and i being the trying-too-hard-don't-want-to-dissapoint person that i am, i made an effort to be extra punctual and arrived to the second (well, minutes actually but second just makes you empathize with me more LOL) -- 10:03 to be exact. everyone else practically arrived between 11:20 and 100pm. great. really. very very frustrating and infuriating. anyway, they arrived late (malamang 'di ba) for the movie, so we "early" people decided to just settle down for lunch instead. was fun hanging out with the barkada again, but circumstances pushed me to leave early. a friend had a house blessing and post-grad graduation party in las pinas for lunch that same day. since it's been 2 years since i last saw these people, and with my other friends screwing up my mood and alotted time-frame, i decided to leave early on the first party and arrive late on the second. i met up with carlos in the shaw station and 2 hours later, under commuting stress and lame tv programming choice in the bus ride, we arrived at ix's place. good food, booze, karaoke and old but familiar faces. it was a bit awkward for me at first but it turned out to be entertaining in its own way.
sunday was my sister's birthday. had the same people from last monday's party come over, with a slightly less fancy but more homey feel to the celebration since we were having it at home. watched kimmy dora later that night after much coercion from my cousins, which turned out to be a bad call since the movie sucked imo. waste of time.
i wasn't able to go to class last monday, which turned out to be a bad call because when i went to nihongo class the following day we apparently were having a big test that very moment. clueless and with close to zilch stock knowledge. whupee. taena. as in. well anyway it goes to say that i bombed that one in epic proportions.
so now... well, things are ok i guess. oh, i've been watching this j-dorama series hirayama sensei introduced to us in class. the title is suika, and it's a pretty good drama, comedy, slice of life series. i'd give it a 8/10. watch it!
my creative juices and literary wit has just been drained completely (obvious naman ata LOL, nagiging dull na mga sentences ko) so i guess i'll end it here. mas sanay lang ako mag hop from english to tagalog much like in casual conversations, although masaya din magsulat na ingles lang. anyfoo babershk~
matagal ko nang pinagpapaliban itong pagsusulat ng update, sobrang tamad lang kasi talaga. marami na kasi nagaganap na may masusulat at maibabahagi pero pagkabukas ko na ng website ng blog ko... parang nawawalan na ako ng gana. isa na rin yun sa mga bagay bagay na nagaganap siguro, parang nawawalan na ako ng gana uli. parang last year lang ah, haha. emo month nga talaga ang august.
so, mga naganap...
kumuha ako ng entrance exam form sa la salle para kay micmic nung QC day last week. hassle. umalis ako ng mga 9 nakarating ako dun mga 11ish. tapos kung san san pa ako napa-ikot at pinalakad kasi strict sila dun sa la salle, at ang layo nung brother whatever na building sa vito cruz. anyway pagka kuha ko ng form naisip kong yayain si nina mag lunch kasi on the way naman sya pauwi. so naglunch kami sa ortigas. chika chika. napabili pa ako ng dri-fit na shorts at shirt kasi sale. impulse splurging. well kailangan ko din naman. tapos nag eiga sai ako nung gabi, memories of tomorrow ung movie. maganda sya, sana panoorin nyo pag may chance kayo. galing ni ken watanabe mag act. saka ung asawa nya magaling din, nagdebate pa nga kami kung sya si kamome diner girl, kamukha nya kasi super. pero later on malalaman din naming hindi sya nung sinearch ni mabel.
nag movie marathon kami nung thursday ni suzie saka ung 2 nyang officemates si sarah at si mabel. UP muna tapos time traveler's wife. SUPER ganda ng UP pag sa 3D. alam mo ung mga 3D na mga picture na medyo hologram looking. para kang nakatingin sa ganon na gumagalaw for 2 hours. nakaka-adik as in. para kang nakadrugs or something LOL. aliw talaga. tinatangal-tangal ko pa nga ung salamin ko para lang i check kung anong mahika meron sa pagiging 3D nya. wierd though kasi hindi blurred ung image pag d mo suot ung salamin. sa disneyland ganon eh, although granted sa disneyland tumatalon outside ng screen talaga ung mga pictures, sa UP parang nalilimit talaga sya ng borders ng frame. anyway. ung time traveler's wife maganda din. magandang romantic movie. napabili pa nga ako ng libro after namin manood ng cine hahaha. maganda din ung libro btw, kakatapos ko lang kahapon. mas kumpleto ung book, pero mas emotionally appealing ung movie. imo, you should enjoy both haha.
itong weekend lang na nakalipas lumabas ako kasama mga kaklase ko nung high school; overnight sa fontana care of mix. uuwi na kasi si beatson this friday so parang huling hirit na malakihan bago sya umuwi sa scotland. 8 kaming lalake (me, jace, kev, mix, manu, dar, pat, plep) tapos 2 na babae (jamie jace's gf, and ail a common friend ng mga college a-boys). sa totoo lang mej hesitant ako pumunta nung simula. malaki talaga kasi issues ko with feeling out of place. at itong mga a-boys na to, hindi sila ang crowd ko nung high school. i mean friend naman kayo at magkakaklase for 4 years and all that, pero alam mo un malaki parin chance na parang sabit lang ako sa gimik nila. good thing it turned out for the better though. it was surprisingly fun and very nostalgic. nakakamiss din talaga high school. masaya ung waterworks pool area ng fontana, nagenjoy ako sa wave pool saka dun sa river thing. masaya ung chikahan papunta, some people never change. natatawa ako dahil nung simula parang boys night out kasi late na dumating ung mga nanay ng gimik. sausage party raw LOL. d kasi ako talaga masyado nakaka boys night out dahil wala akong ganong crowd sa barkada ko, pero fun sya occassionally. buti na lang din pumunta si jamie kasi kung wala sya wala kaming decent dinner (pinagluto nya kami ~♥). where would the lost a-boys be without their wendy :P.
so eto ako ngayon. tinatamad na namana ako sa buhay ko. ang dali ko talaga mag-sawa. kailangan ko talaga ng something new or at least panibagong motivation or mareinforce mga old motivations ko. kakainis. anyway babershk.
so, mga naganap...
kumuha ako ng entrance exam form sa la salle para kay micmic nung QC day last week. hassle. umalis ako ng mga 9 nakarating ako dun mga 11ish. tapos kung san san pa ako napa-ikot at pinalakad kasi strict sila dun sa la salle, at ang layo nung brother whatever na building sa vito cruz. anyway pagka kuha ko ng form naisip kong yayain si nina mag lunch kasi on the way naman sya pauwi. so naglunch kami sa ortigas. chika chika. napabili pa ako ng dri-fit na shorts at shirt kasi sale. impulse splurging. well kailangan ko din naman. tapos nag eiga sai ako nung gabi, memories of tomorrow ung movie. maganda sya, sana panoorin nyo pag may chance kayo. galing ni ken watanabe mag act. saka ung asawa nya magaling din, nagdebate pa nga kami kung sya si kamome diner girl, kamukha nya kasi super. pero later on malalaman din naming hindi sya nung sinearch ni mabel.
nag movie marathon kami nung thursday ni suzie saka ung 2 nyang officemates si sarah at si mabel. UP muna tapos time traveler's wife. SUPER ganda ng UP pag sa 3D. alam mo ung mga 3D na mga picture na medyo hologram looking. para kang nakatingin sa ganon na gumagalaw for 2 hours. nakaka-adik as in. para kang nakadrugs or something LOL. aliw talaga. tinatangal-tangal ko pa nga ung salamin ko para lang i check kung anong mahika meron sa pagiging 3D nya. wierd though kasi hindi blurred ung image pag d mo suot ung salamin. sa disneyland ganon eh, although granted sa disneyland tumatalon outside ng screen talaga ung mga pictures, sa UP parang nalilimit talaga sya ng borders ng frame. anyway. ung time traveler's wife maganda din. magandang romantic movie. napabili pa nga ako ng libro after namin manood ng cine hahaha. maganda din ung libro btw, kakatapos ko lang kahapon. mas kumpleto ung book, pero mas emotionally appealing ung movie. imo, you should enjoy both haha.
itong weekend lang na nakalipas lumabas ako kasama mga kaklase ko nung high school; overnight sa fontana care of mix. uuwi na kasi si beatson this friday so parang huling hirit na malakihan bago sya umuwi sa scotland. 8 kaming lalake (me, jace, kev, mix, manu, dar, pat, plep) tapos 2 na babae (jamie jace's gf, and ail a common friend ng mga college a-boys). sa totoo lang mej hesitant ako pumunta nung simula. malaki talaga kasi issues ko with feeling out of place. at itong mga a-boys na to, hindi sila ang crowd ko nung high school. i mean friend naman kayo at magkakaklase for 4 years and all that, pero alam mo un malaki parin chance na parang sabit lang ako sa gimik nila. good thing it turned out for the better though. it was surprisingly fun and very nostalgic. nakakamiss din talaga high school. masaya ung waterworks pool area ng fontana, nagenjoy ako sa wave pool saka dun sa river thing. masaya ung chikahan papunta, some people never change. natatawa ako dahil nung simula parang boys night out kasi late na dumating ung mga nanay ng gimik. sausage party raw LOL. d kasi ako talaga masyado nakaka boys night out dahil wala akong ganong crowd sa barkada ko, pero fun sya occassionally. buti na lang din pumunta si jamie kasi kung wala sya wala kaming decent dinner (pinagluto nya kami ~♥). where would the lost a-boys be without their wendy :P.
so eto ako ngayon. tinatamad na namana ako sa buhay ko. ang dali ko talaga mag-sawa. kailangan ko talaga ng something new or at least panibagong motivation or mareinforce mga old motivations ko. kakainis. anyway babershk.
so ayun surfing sa la union. my second time to go surfing and as before the plan was to leave manila at friday evening ,arrive in san juan on the wee hours of the night, stay for a day and leave before lunch time on sunday. the experience was a bit different this time because instead of just us cousins going out for the weekend, now we brought the whole entourage. and to spice things up, the recent typhon/hurricane/bagyo that just left luzon headed north west into taiwan and the waves going down south east into the bay area of san juan was nothing short of huge. of course it wasnt really extremely huge, maybe around an adult's height on average, but for noobs like us it was like facing attumen in blues.
the waves weren't that bad for surfing really, but they were intense. intense because the waves were faster and you really had to pick your pace up when paddling and making an effort to stand up and ride the waves. with huge waves covering most of the available coastline the space for the smaller more managable waves that broke closer to the shore didnt give you much time to ride them as they come by. plus the fact that with the big waves coming at you each and every time, the rest period between surfs is close to practically zero, pushing you to exhaustion real fast (at least compared to last time). in short, it was a learn fast or die fast kind of situation hahaha. fun.
so nung gabi naman ng sabaday, inom kwentuhan with the cousins. mej kulang kulang ang grupo kasi ung iba natulog ng maaga, ung iba naman may mga batang inaalagaan. kami lang nila ate lei, eiselle at kuya con ung talagang nagchikahan. nagbrownout pa nga nang may katagalan nung gabi, pero ayos lang kasi malupet naman ung posisyon namin sa may beach: masarap ung hangin, d naman talaga ganon kadilim, may sounds galing sa malupet na speakers ni dairy (boyfriend ni ate eiselle), at wine na dala nila ate nene. anyway, first time ko magkwento sa mga pinsan ko sa mga kwentong buhay ko. tahimik kasi ako talaga usually, lalo na kung harapan. mej nanginginig pa nga boses ko non haha, kabado eh. pero ok lang, naman. keri lang sya. mej nabuhay nga lang uli ung mga lumang issues sa utak ko. i mean hindi ko na sila iniisip, pero ngayong naalala ko parang nawalan uling credibility ung tao sa kwento ko. pero ewan ko ba, kahit na tinitingnan ko uli sya anew with their comments (at wala naman masyado c kuya con lang talaga matanong talaga) parang mahirap parin talaga gumawa ng perfect decision na kaya mong sundan 100%. ung alam mo bang tama talaga without any doubt. labo nya naman kasi talaga eh, as in. anyway. wag na magpa buwiset ng sarili. tapos ay tapos. haha. malas ko lang at kailangan ko ulitin ung kwento kina ate nene sa susunod na labas (next week). susme, hahaha sana un na ung huli. ayaw ko na syang buhayin pa uli.
anyway eto nakauwi na kami. maghahabol ako slight sa nihongo ko at nainspire magpaka-fit mas lalo. taenang mga surfer kasi yan, batak kung batak amp. parang proud naman ako sa progress ko, pero compared sa kanila parang walang pagbabagong naganap sakin hahahaha. asa kayo, darating din ako sa lebel na yan balang araw. dapat pag marunong na ako magsurf ng maayos ganon na katawan ko hahaha. pangako ko yan sa sarili ko lol.
anyfoo, babershk.
the waves weren't that bad for surfing really, but they were intense. intense because the waves were faster and you really had to pick your pace up when paddling and making an effort to stand up and ride the waves. with huge waves covering most of the available coastline the space for the smaller more managable waves that broke closer to the shore didnt give you much time to ride them as they come by. plus the fact that with the big waves coming at you each and every time, the rest period between surfs is close to practically zero, pushing you to exhaustion real fast (at least compared to last time). in short, it was a learn fast or die fast kind of situation hahaha. fun.
so nung gabi naman ng sabaday, inom kwentuhan with the cousins. mej kulang kulang ang grupo kasi ung iba natulog ng maaga, ung iba naman may mga batang inaalagaan. kami lang nila ate lei, eiselle at kuya con ung talagang nagchikahan. nagbrownout pa nga nang may katagalan nung gabi, pero ayos lang kasi malupet naman ung posisyon namin sa may beach: masarap ung hangin, d naman talaga ganon kadilim, may sounds galing sa malupet na speakers ni dairy (boyfriend ni ate eiselle), at wine na dala nila ate nene. anyway, first time ko magkwento sa mga pinsan ko sa mga kwentong buhay ko. tahimik kasi ako talaga usually, lalo na kung harapan. mej nanginginig pa nga boses ko non haha, kabado eh. pero ok lang, naman. keri lang sya. mej nabuhay nga lang uli ung mga lumang issues sa utak ko. i mean hindi ko na sila iniisip, pero ngayong naalala ko parang nawalan uling credibility ung tao sa kwento ko. pero ewan ko ba, kahit na tinitingnan ko uli sya anew with their comments (at wala naman masyado c kuya con lang talaga matanong talaga) parang mahirap parin talaga gumawa ng perfect decision na kaya mong sundan 100%. ung alam mo bang tama talaga without any doubt. labo nya naman kasi talaga eh, as in. anyway. wag na magpa buwiset ng sarili. tapos ay tapos. haha. malas ko lang at kailangan ko ulitin ung kwento kina ate nene sa susunod na labas (next week). susme, hahaha sana un na ung huli. ayaw ko na syang buhayin pa uli.
anyway eto nakauwi na kami. maghahabol ako slight sa nihongo ko at nainspire magpaka-fit mas lalo. taenang mga surfer kasi yan, batak kung batak amp. parang proud naman ako sa progress ko, pero compared sa kanila parang walang pagbabagong naganap sakin hahahaha. asa kayo, darating din ako sa lebel na yan balang araw. dapat pag marunong na ako magsurf ng maayos ganon na katawan ko hahaha. pangako ko yan sa sarili ko lol.
anyfoo, babershk.
nagdecide ung tita, tito, and 2 cousins (anak ng tito) na magpunta sa wake ni cory kahapon. nakisama na rin ako kasi well wala naman akong gagawin talaga ng hapon, "this is being part of history", etc. and to cut the intro short, we went there.
pag dating namin dun the line was so effin long. first it extends from the front of the chapel on general luna and stretches to the front of PLM takes the right corner and extends around 50 meters down the road before turning around completely and going all the way back to the front of the cathedral and beyond. sabi ng mga tao, during the time that we arrived, the end was at sta. cruz... and that's over the bridge na halos quiapo na ata. very long. we arrived at exactly 638pm on my watch, set foot on our end of the line at around 700 and we left the church at 1138. it was a 4 and a half hour wait for a 3 second glimpse (even less) of the democtratic hero.
i did want to pay my respects to cory aquino. and although i honestly don't know much about her term and governance, i thought that going there somehow i could realize the true significance of her deeds and role in the past 40 years. but really one of the reasons why i decided to go was because she was jiggy's lola. you could say it was the final push in making me decide to go and stand up for almost 5 hours for the 3 second finish. part to simply just be there and be part of history (selfish), and partly just wanting to pay my respects to someone important, and should be important to every filipino.
hay pero really when you get there it will make you think. people out there are kidding around, may mga highschoolers pang nangtritrip lang (ung biglang sisigaw lang sila to get attention tapos magtatawanan), and lot of people who aren't really taking things seriously. it's partly their fault partly the fault of the long line, you just can't help but be drawn out of your contemplative mood into the noise of the impatient and tired masses. and you really can't blame them. ikaw ba tumayo ka ng halos limang oras, pagod na binti mo, naulanan ka na ng onti, medyo gutom or uhaw, inaantok, baka pa nga nac-cr ka pa d ka lang maka-alis sa pila. and being all this, you enter hurriedly into the cathedral in a paced walk. and as you inch your way to the casket and finally get to see her and try to think of a small prayer, try to imagine her life and how she was, try to bring to life her memory, someone at the back says "lakad lang po tayo, pakibilisan". at un na. wala ka ring nagawa. i mean nakita mo and then... wala. all you could do was take in kung gaano ka drastic ng change sa appearance nya. super payat ng mukha, pati ung fingers halos buto't balat na lang. talagang maiisip mo kung gaano ka tindi ung last months of her life na kinakain ng cancer buong katawan nya. must have been hell. but it's like being cut off in mid-thought, and you trying to recover from that mental confusion, being slightly absent minded as you try to think and hold on to your thoughts while being dragged along with the line.
honestly d ko alam kung na-achieve ko ba ung purpose ko sa pagpunta dun. feel ko hindi. cguro masyado ko lang sineseryoso ung thing. i think i should have, and at least i know i tried to give her the respect that she deserves. it's just hard to do it given the circumstances. so would i say was it worth the 4 hour and a half wait, going hungry, tired and slightly drenched in rain? d ko rin alam eh, pero at least i know it wasn't a waste of my time.
pag dating namin dun the line was so effin long. first it extends from the front of the chapel on general luna and stretches to the front of PLM takes the right corner and extends around 50 meters down the road before turning around completely and going all the way back to the front of the cathedral and beyond. sabi ng mga tao, during the time that we arrived, the end was at sta. cruz... and that's over the bridge na halos quiapo na ata. very long. we arrived at exactly 638pm on my watch, set foot on our end of the line at around 700 and we left the church at 1138. it was a 4 and a half hour wait for a 3 second glimpse (even less) of the democtratic hero.
i did want to pay my respects to cory aquino. and although i honestly don't know much about her term and governance, i thought that going there somehow i could realize the true significance of her deeds and role in the past 40 years. but really one of the reasons why i decided to go was because she was jiggy's lola. you could say it was the final push in making me decide to go and stand up for almost 5 hours for the 3 second finish. part to simply just be there and be part of history (selfish), and partly just wanting to pay my respects to someone important, and should be important to every filipino.
hay pero really when you get there it will make you think. people out there are kidding around, may mga highschoolers pang nangtritrip lang (ung biglang sisigaw lang sila to get attention tapos magtatawanan), and lot of people who aren't really taking things seriously. it's partly their fault partly the fault of the long line, you just can't help but be drawn out of your contemplative mood into the noise of the impatient and tired masses. and you really can't blame them. ikaw ba tumayo ka ng halos limang oras, pagod na binti mo, naulanan ka na ng onti, medyo gutom or uhaw, inaantok, baka pa nga nac-cr ka pa d ka lang maka-alis sa pila. and being all this, you enter hurriedly into the cathedral in a paced walk. and as you inch your way to the casket and finally get to see her and try to think of a small prayer, try to imagine her life and how she was, try to bring to life her memory, someone at the back says "lakad lang po tayo, pakibilisan". at un na. wala ka ring nagawa. i mean nakita mo and then... wala. all you could do was take in kung gaano ka drastic ng change sa appearance nya. super payat ng mukha, pati ung fingers halos buto't balat na lang. talagang maiisip mo kung gaano ka tindi ung last months of her life na kinakain ng cancer buong katawan nya. must have been hell. but it's like being cut off in mid-thought, and you trying to recover from that mental confusion, being slightly absent minded as you try to think and hold on to your thoughts while being dragged along with the line.
honestly d ko alam kung na-achieve ko ba ung purpose ko sa pagpunta dun. feel ko hindi. cguro masyado ko lang sineseryoso ung thing. i think i should have, and at least i know i tried to give her the respect that she deserves. it's just hard to do it given the circumstances. so would i say was it worth the 4 hour and a half wait, going hungry, tired and slightly drenched in rain? d ko rin alam eh, pero at least i know it wasn't a waste of my time.
so nanood ako ng eiga-sai sa shang cinema 3 kahapon. dapat kasama ko sina nina lendl at dr manood, pero originally kasi plano nilang manood ng transformers 2. pero kasi sa loob loob ko, hindi naman ganon kaganda un so inimbita ko na rin sila manood na lang sa eiga-sai, maganda kasi ung palabas that evening -- ALWAYS: sunset on third street (iniisip ko kung bakit may dalawang 'day/sun' kanji dun sa title. pero nung nakita ko ung translation nagets ko na haha). pero kwento kasi sakin napupuno raw talaga sya, so dapat mga 1hour before pumunta na kayo at kumuha ng tickets. eh hindi pede kumuha ng ticket for other people, at hindi pede si nina ng 6 (7 ung start ng evening movie). so sabi niya transformers na lang raw sila. so although, pede ako magimbita ng ibang tao mej nahiya ako at nanood na lang ako magisa.
pinanood ko ung 430 movie, kamome shokudou (seagull diner), saka ung sa 700, ALWAYS. maganda sila pareho! as in, win. promise. putaenang bwiset lang ung katabi ko sa kamome pero maganda sya. light movie, na slice of life with splashes of comedy here and there. super charming pa ng bida na babae. magegets nyo pag makita nyo sya kumilos. i highly recommend. ay saka ung last line ng scene sa movie, haha magaling kasi i completely agree. irasshai~
ung ALWAYS mas "epic" na movie. highest grossing blockbuster sya sa japan sa year na pinalabas sya if i'm not mistaken, kaya sya ung parang "main event" movie ng eiga sai. fun sya, may comedy pero more of drama ang kwento. pero infairness napaiyak ako ilang beses sa movie ah. ahahaha. buti din pala wala akong kasama manood :P nakakahiya eh hahaha. basta panoorin nyo din to. promise. really really nice. saka narealize ko kamukha nga ng nanay ni william c koyuki. hahaha! ay saka cute ung babaeng helper na may punto. kansai ata un? d ko sure. nakakatawa pa dun (nihongo joke) ung name kasi nung babae mutsuko. kanji nya is 6 (mutsu) saka child (ko). 6th child kasi sya sa family kaya un pangalan. tapos tawag sa kanya sa movie roku-chan (6 din meaning) "roku ja nai, mutsuko desu...". haha cute. anyway. un lang. at least may pinatutunguhan nihongo ko haha.
saka masaya kasi may mga lines saka nakasulat na mas nagegets ko in the context ng pagkakasabi. minsan kasi hindi perfect ung translation, kaya mas may "insight" ka sa sinabi pag nagets mo talaga ung nihongo. galing. nakakatuwa. mas nainspire ako mag-aral. haha.
anyfoo. babershk~
pinanood ko ung 430 movie, kamome shokudou (seagull diner), saka ung sa 700, ALWAYS. maganda sila pareho! as in, win. promise. putaenang bwiset lang ung katabi ko sa kamome pero maganda sya. light movie, na slice of life with splashes of comedy here and there. super charming pa ng bida na babae. magegets nyo pag makita nyo sya kumilos. i highly recommend. ay saka ung last line ng scene sa movie, haha magaling kasi i completely agree. irasshai~
ung ALWAYS mas "epic" na movie. highest grossing blockbuster sya sa japan sa year na pinalabas sya if i'm not mistaken, kaya sya ung parang "main event" movie ng eiga sai. fun sya, may comedy pero more of drama ang kwento. pero infairness napaiyak ako ilang beses sa movie ah. ahahaha. buti din pala wala akong kasama manood :P nakakahiya eh hahaha. basta panoorin nyo din to. promise. really really nice. saka narealize ko kamukha nga ng nanay ni william c koyuki. hahaha! ay saka cute ung babaeng helper na may punto. kansai ata un? d ko sure. nakakatawa pa dun (nihongo joke) ung name kasi nung babae mutsuko. kanji nya is 6 (mutsu) saka child (ko). 6th child kasi sya sa family kaya un pangalan. tapos tawag sa kanya sa movie roku-chan (6 din meaning) "roku ja nai, mutsuko desu...". haha cute. anyway. un lang. at least may pinatutunguhan nihongo ko haha.
saka masaya kasi may mga lines saka nakasulat na mas nagegets ko in the context ng pagkakasabi. minsan kasi hindi perfect ung translation, kaya mas may "insight" ka sa sinabi pag nagets mo talaga ung nihongo. galing. nakakatuwa. mas nainspire ako mag-aral. haha.
anyfoo. babershk~
may kaibigan akong parating kausap sa plurk na medyo napunta sa isang emo na kinalalagyan. feeling nya kasi masyado siyang nagsasaya sa buhay nya cguro. at pinipilit sya ng mundo na tumanda na, at maging responsableng mamamayan ng mundo, ika nga ng mga nakatatanda. tapos alam mo yun, the usual, nakakapressure, kailangan na magtrabaho, dapat maging super productive etc. tama naman sila, and believe me na-emo ako ng matagal dahil sa ganyang usapan, pero minsan kailangan mo rin sundan puso mo. kung puro mundo na lang iisipin mo, hindi ka rin mageenjoy. dapat may iwan ka rin para sa sarili mo. dapat balanced. pero syempre para sa akin parang hindi naman ako nagmomove on talaga sa buhay ko. gago kasi eh, taena. pero let's not get into it. wala kasing patutunguhan ang usapan. bawal ganyan, dapat paharap ang lakad.
so eto ok naman ako. bihira tong nageenjoy talaga ako sa klase. although feeling ko baka niro-romanticize ko lang sya. pero isa ito sa mga bagay na gusto ko talaga matutunan. alam mo un. willing effort kung kailangan. sa CoE kasi... ewan i mean may mga na-eenjoy naman akong mga klase. pero alam mo un. parang ang dami kong reklamo. puro reklamo i swear. tamad kasi ako. nagbibigay naman ako ng effort, pero alam mo un kung nageenjoy ka d ka naman talaga magiging emo reklamador d ba. kung may pede lang patunguhan careerwise tong nihongo puta, this is it. cguro mix ng IT saka nihongo haha. ay saka kung pede talagang ituloy to till JLPT 1 puta gagawin ko. any ideas how to mix that with earning money to be self-sustaining? hahaha.
ay so magiging busy na tong plurk friend ko, so mej mamimiss ko sya. may mga tao ka kasing parating kausap sa bawat medium of communication mo. nagkataon na lately sya ang aking kachika sa plurk. and wierd no? may mga tao talagang masarap kausap, lalo na online na super daling maging pranka at loose. well at least may mga bagong Y!M kachika na ako dahil parati silang online sa work. you win some you lose some.
ay masaya nihongo class namin. may calligraphy pa kami sa kanji class. saya. parang ang saya nya aralin. sana hindi ako tamarin magpractice sa bahay. para ka kasing nagdradrawing. artistic haha.
ay napanood ko transformers 2 kanina. ok lang. adrenaline rush lang sya. period. ganda ng mata ni megan fox.
cge yan na lang muna. babai.
so eto ok naman ako. bihira tong nageenjoy talaga ako sa klase. although feeling ko baka niro-romanticize ko lang sya. pero isa ito sa mga bagay na gusto ko talaga matutunan. alam mo un. willing effort kung kailangan. sa CoE kasi... ewan i mean may mga na-eenjoy naman akong mga klase. pero alam mo un. parang ang dami kong reklamo. puro reklamo i swear. tamad kasi ako. nagbibigay naman ako ng effort, pero alam mo un kung nageenjoy ka d ka naman talaga magiging emo reklamador d ba. kung may pede lang patunguhan careerwise tong nihongo puta, this is it. cguro mix ng IT saka nihongo haha. ay saka kung pede talagang ituloy to till JLPT 1 puta gagawin ko. any ideas how to mix that with earning money to be self-sustaining? hahaha.
ay so magiging busy na tong plurk friend ko, so mej mamimiss ko sya. may mga tao ka kasing parating kausap sa bawat medium of communication mo. nagkataon na lately sya ang aking kachika sa plurk. and wierd no? may mga tao talagang masarap kausap, lalo na online na super daling maging pranka at loose. well at least may mga bagong Y!M kachika na ako dahil parati silang online sa work. you win some you lose some.
ay masaya nihongo class namin. may calligraphy pa kami sa kanji class. saya. parang ang saya nya aralin. sana hindi ako tamarin magpractice sa bahay. para ka kasing nagdradrawing. artistic haha.
ay napanood ko transformers 2 kanina. ok lang. adrenaline rush lang sya. period. ganda ng mata ni megan fox.
cge yan na lang muna. babai.
yesterday was one of the few times as of late that i've had epic fun. the day started out not that special with torrential rainfall ruining the morning, and mom asking me to drive her to pipe2 at central ave./road (dunno really how you should call that stretch of concrete) even when it was raining hard. good for me though that i had to pass by UP that day so she had my sister do her bidding *mwahahaha*. ninja moves for the win.
( i paid for my tuition... )
( i paid for my tuition... )
couldn't think of a better title for the entry, but if titles are meant to give you an idea of what to expect, well then i think i got it right on the kisser. so... updates.
started watching K-ON! which is a slice of life, cutesy, band music kind of anime. it started along with the other spring season shows but i didn't bother to actually start with it since i was being elitist and wanted anime with more substance in them. and among the tens of possible prospects, only 1 satisfied my delicate palate -- Higashi no Eden (Eden of the East). anyway one of my buds, Wil, mentioned that K-ON! was pretty good and since i didn't really find a big catch for this season i said "what the hell" and decided to watch it anyway. he was right, it is pretty good haha. it's funny how the usual blend for these kinds of anime never gets old, and though on the surface it really is just the usual blend it isn't as boring and old as most people consider new anime from this genre to be. at in fairness ah, even if it is just the usual moe slice of life gig, it's pretty good at what it does and that's what makes people keep coming back for more.
i've been lifting weights the past weeks. though it's a bit of a on off thing due to overexertion, trying to get the right volume of reps, sets, and weight, and that IE8 run which i wanted to be fully rested for. anyway i realized how... out-of-the-blue/ impulsive/ what-i-feel-like-doing kind of a person i am. i don't really stick to my particular plan and follow the sets and reps i need to do. i just do what i think i should be doing, and to hell with real discipline and constant progress. doing what i can til i can't do it anymore, but not pushing myself beyond my limit -- it's an attitude that lacks ambition and i think that's who i am right now. a make-do so-so person. kinda sad actually. hope i find something to get me going soon. inspiration and motivation are hard to come by these days.
oh i gained 7 pounds the last time i weighed in. yay~ from 144 lbs. to 151 lbs. woot for weights, jogging, and proper eating habits (yeah right... proper eating habits... lol).
i've been drawing again lately. mainly because i'm getting tired of playing.
gonna study jap and take jlpt 3 on october. wish me luck. it's one of the things i'm really excited about this sem.
that's all for now. ja ne~
babershk~
started watching K-ON! which is a slice of life, cutesy, band music kind of anime. it started along with the other spring season shows but i didn't bother to actually start with it since i was being elitist and wanted anime with more substance in them. and among the tens of possible prospects, only 1 satisfied my delicate palate -- Higashi no Eden (Eden of the East). anyway one of my buds, Wil, mentioned that K-ON! was pretty good and since i didn't really find a big catch for this season i said "what the hell" and decided to watch it anyway. he was right, it is pretty good haha. it's funny how the usual blend for these kinds of anime never gets old, and though on the surface it really is just the usual blend it isn't as boring and old as most people consider new anime from this genre to be. at in fairness ah, even if it is just the usual moe slice of life gig, it's pretty good at what it does and that's what makes people keep coming back for more.
i've been lifting weights the past weeks. though it's a bit of a on off thing due to overexertion, trying to get the right volume of reps, sets, and weight, and that IE8 run which i wanted to be fully rested for. anyway i realized how... out-of-the-blue/ impulsive/ what-i-feel-like-doing kind of a person i am. i don't really stick to my particular plan and follow the sets and reps i need to do. i just do what i think i should be doing, and to hell with real discipline and constant progress. doing what i can til i can't do it anymore, but not pushing myself beyond my limit -- it's an attitude that lacks ambition and i think that's who i am right now. a make-do so-so person. kinda sad actually. hope i find something to get me going soon. inspiration and motivation are hard to come by these days.
oh i gained 7 pounds the last time i weighed in. yay~ from 144 lbs. to 151 lbs. woot for weights, jogging, and proper eating habits (yeah right... proper eating habits... lol).
i've been drawing again lately. mainly because i'm getting tired of playing.
gonna study jap and take jlpt 3 on october. wish me luck. it's one of the things i'm really excited about this sem.
that's all for now. ja ne~
babershk~
